Love & War, a Zashley Story
by xtisdaleholic
Summary: Take place during World War II. Zachary's an American Private that goes to the front, in Poland. There, he meets a Jewish Pole girl and slowly falls in love with her. What happens when she's taken away from him?
1. Chapter 1

_**New Orleans, USA, 1937**_

Zachary Jonathan Stephens, 16, was coming back from school on his bicycle and when he turned into the driveway, he saw the doctor's car. He threw his bike aside and ran in the house. What if it was too late? What if he hadn't had the chance to see his father for the very last time?

His mother looked up at him when she heard him slam the door behind him. Her cheeks were streaming with tears but she said nothing as her son ran pass her.

Zachary took the doorknob with his hand, still hesitating. He peeked inside and the look the doctor gave him informed him that his father was close to death. Tears formed in his eyes as the doctor left the room. His father has always been the biggest inspiration in Zachary's life and seeing him like that was hard.

"Come here, son" his father said, motioning to Zachary to come closer.

Zachary walked to his father's bed. He didn't know of this was going to be the last moment with him so he didn't want to blink and take the chance to lose one second of the sight of him.

"I'd like you to do some things for me, my boy" he started. "First, you have to promise me that you'll take care of your mother."

"I promise" the boy replied with tears in his eyes.

"Stay the boy that you are while becoming a man. Keep helping people and most of all, stay strong, whatever happens, you have to stay strong."

Huge sobs were preventing Zachary from talking. His lips refused to budge. He hugged his father as tears fell from his eyes. He finally got out of the room and went to the kitchen with his mother.

_**The next morning… **_

Zachary woke up and walked to the kitchen. Everything was incredibly quiet in the house. The sound of his father agonizing in the bedroom wasn't audible. When he saw his mother crying, he understood.

Emily looked up at him and when she saw his face, she simply nodded to confirm his thoughts.

"He won't suffer anymore" she said.

Zachary realized that he was now the man of the house and that he had to take care of his mother. He would drop out of school to get a decent job and bring home some money. He also knew that she would never let him do that. She always dreamed that her son becomes a doctor or a lawyer.

_**New Orleans, USA, 1939**_

World War II had been declared a few weeks ago and Zachary, who was now a newspaper seller had seen it on a cover. He was passionate by it and read every article about it. Sometimes, he even brought the subject at dinner, even though his mother hated it.

"Can you imagine people coming here and drop some bombs on our wonderful country? Those people are living in hell" Zachary's mother said.

"They won't come here, mom. Everything happens back in Europe" he explained, his mouth full.

"Don't be so sure. I mean, the name says it all, it's a World War. Nothing's gonna stop them from…"

"It means that every country is fighting, not that they will destroy the world" Zachary interrupted.

"Well I still think we should be careful and ready."

"I thought about going there" he admitted to his mother.

"What?" Emily exclaimed. "Go to Europe?"

"Actually, I'm going to Europe, mom."

Emily looked at him, trying to understand what was going on on her son's mind.

"If I didn't volunteer, they would've taken me away, anyway. It's the law, now, because of the war."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I'm 18 and a man of the United States of America. I have to honor my country."

He waited for an answer but Emily stayed there, shocked.

"I leave next month. I fly to Paris then take the train to Poland. That's where I'm gonna be for a while."

"You already know everything and didn't tell me? Zachary, can you understand how worried I am?"

"Everything's going to be fine and I promise to write you a letter every week" Zachary assured.

"Anything can happen, you know that?"

"I know, but I'm not scared."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Paris, France, 1939**_

"Everything's going to be fine, mom, I promise. And I'll write to you every week."

He hugged her tight then heard someone calling the privates to get into the train because they were leaving in five minutes.

"Alright, I have to go now… I love you." Zachary said, planting a kiss on her forehead.

He took his bag and got into the train.

"I love you too, honey" his mother told him as the train started to leave. She blew him a kiss and waved one last time before losing eye contact.

_**In the train…**_

Zachary was looking outside as the train made his way to Poland. Each second, he was getting closer to the battle. He wasn't scared. He looked up when someone entered his wagon.

"Hey man. Mind if we sit here?" a tall guy asked him.

"No, not at all. I'm Zachary, by the way" he introduced himself, holding out his hand.

"I'm Scott, this is David" he replied, shaking Zachary's hand.

"Nice to meet you" David shook Zachary's hand too and sat across him. "So, where are you from?"

"Louisiana. New Orleans."

"Cool, I'm from New York."

"What about you?" he asked Scott.

"Savannah. Georgia."

"I've been there last summer"

He smiled and they talked more, getting to know each other.

_**Warsaw, Poland, 1939**_

Zachary climbed on the top bunk, clearly dead tired from this whole day of traveling. Scott was the one on the bed under his and David was right next to them. They were already good friends.

"Enjoy your dreams tonight, guys. It's probably the only good one you're gonna have during your time here." Scott said.

"Thanks for being so supportive, man. I'm shitting my pants but hey, it's ok." David replied.

Zachary laughed, enjoying the moment with his new friends.

_**The next day… **_

Zachary lay down in a trench, holding his firegun on his shoulder. David was next to him. He was his binomial for the time they were going to stay here. That meant they had to stick together no matter what. Now, he admitted it, he was terribly scared. His heart was beating so fast. He thought he would die from a heart attack, not from a bullet. All he could think about was his mother and how he wanted her to be here right now. He looked around, seeing his friends' eyes, realizing they were probably thinking the same thing. He heard a gunshot and his heat beat faster. He closed his eyes for a second, feeling a tear falling down his cheek. He didn't want to die.

"They are getting closer, man" David whispered tearfully.

His hands were shaking even though he was trying to calm himself down.

Zachary aimed at a German soldier and shot in his direction. He saw him fall to the ground but he didn't know if it was him that killed him. He felt sick to his stomach when he saw one of them getting a bullet straight in the head. It was completely crazy and disgusting but he reminded himself that he was doing that to save people from the crazy Furher that Hitler was. He took a deep breath and aimed at another German.

_**Later that night…**_

Zachary was sitting outside of the military base with Scott and David, smoking a cigarette.

"My fiancée's waiting for me in New York. She's a Canadian, you know. I met her in Texas though, last summer." David said, taking a photo out of his pocket.

His girlfriend was blonde and had amazing emerald green eyes.

"She's really pretty" Scott pointed out.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" Zachary asked him.

"No, you?"

"No" he answered his own question. "I still live with my mother"

"Well, you won't find one here, I can tell you!" Scott laughed.

"Why are you saying that?"

"We won't even talk about the Pole girls" David laughed with Scott.

Zachary threw his cigarette away and stood up.

"You know, American girls aren't all pretty either."

And with that, he left them behind. They were pretty immature to think that every girl had to be pretty. Alright, maybe Pole girls weren't the prettiest but they were beautiful in their own way, just like everyone else. Anyway, he didn't care. He wasn't here to fall in love, he was here to help and save people.

_**Inside… **_

He lay down on his bunk and stared at the ceiling. Everything that was going on around him made him want to throw up. Like anybody else, he wanted to change the world and make it a better place. He thought of his life back home and his head started to spin. He got up and decided to take a walk around Warsaw, maybe it would change his mind of things.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N**

**Hey! So here's the thing; this used to be a YouTube series and I've just realized that there's no 'photos' here so it's confusing because I've changed the name of all the characters (actors). Since Ashley's character is a Pole, I had to take a name that fit so her name is Natalia. I know it may be confusing because of this and I'm sorry … -_-' Oh & also when the quotes are italic, it means they speak in Polish **

Zachary was walking in a quiet neighborhood of Warsaw, smoking a cigarette. It was cold outside and he regretted that he didn't put a coat on.

"_What time is it_?" a brunette asked in Polish to a girl standing beside her.

They were walking on the sidewalk across the street.

Zachary turned around, looking for whoever had talked. He saw two girls walking to the opposite sidewalk.

"_It's six o'clock_" the other girl replied in their mother language.

"_We're late!_" the first girl exclaimed, walking faster.

The two girls walked faster and they both stopped in their tracks when they saw Zachary looking at them.

He saw the fear in their eyes. The younger was completely afraid. It's like she couldn't move anymore even if she wanted to. She probably wanted to run away from him.

The bag the younger girl was holding broke and all the canned food that was inside fell on the sidewalk. The older one bent down to pick up the mess.

Zachary ran to help them.

The two girls walked a few steps back and he understood that they were scared of his uniform.

"Don't worry, I'm American" he explained.

They looked at him, even more scared. They didn't get anything of what he had said. Zachary bent down and began to pick up some cans. The older girl walked closer carefully then she helped him to pick up the mess. Meanwhile, the other girl looked at them from where she stood then walked slowly to them, wanting to help.

Zachary accidentally hustled the youngest's arm when she stood up.

"I'm sorry!" he exclaimed immediately. "Did I hurt you?"

She simply stood back up and rubbed her arm. Then they both looked at him for a long time without saying anything. He did the same, his hands in his pockets. He showed them the American flag on his sleeve to tell them that they had nothing to worry about. Both girls smiled softly.

"I'm Zachary Stephens" he introduced himself, realizing that the girls were less scared now.

"_Izabela_" said the older one, ignoring if he had said his name. "_This is Natalia_" she added, pointing the other girl.

Zachary nodded and smiled. Izabela said something he didn't understand and they were both gone. Natalia turned around twice to look at him before disappearing behind the corner.

_**The next week…**_

Zachary walked into the general store to buy some stuff for himself such as toothpaste and also the day newspapers. He heard some giggles coming from the back of the store and walked closer. He then saw the face of the girl that obsessed him for the last seven days.

Natalia froze at the sight of the uniform. Anything of the kind was scaring her. She looked up and recognized Zachary's face. Her body relaxed and she smiled softly at him.

"_Hello_" he stammered, ignoring if he pronounced the word right.

The two girls giggled politely. He realized that he had said the word wrong so he giggled with them. He stopped his gaze in Natalia's eyes. She looked down, blushing, still giggling softly.

"_I'll be in the front_" Izabela said, leaving the two of them in the back.

Every time she met Zachary's gaze, Natalia would blush and look away. He felt stupid but took a notepad out of his back pocket and searched through it while Natalia looked at him, amused.

"_You are very pretty_" Zachary enunciated shyly, looking at her.

"_Thank you_" she replied, smiling softly.

Zachary took a long look at her. She giggled at his clumsiness, thinking he was charming and cute. He chuckled, feeling stupid, and took a deep breath.

"_I'd like to take you out_" he stuttered, knowing he was saying everything wrong. "_Do you like theater_?"

He had practiced this for the past week and even wrote it down to be sure.

"_My parents don't allow me to leave the house without my sister. I can't go anywhere except here_" Natalia explained as if Zachary could understand everything.

He tried to understand at least a few words but not one sounded like English. Did she accepted his invitation or she told him that she wasn't interested? Natalia shook her head slowly and Zachary lost his smile.

"Me… cannot" she tried to say in English.

"_Natalia, we're leaving_" Izabela called from the front desk.

"_I have to go home. I would've loved to go to the theater with you, Zachary_" Natalia said.

He nodded slightly and sadly even though he didn't understand what she just said. The only thing he could remember was that she said his name. She remembered his name. She said his name…

_**Outside…**_

"_You have a crush on this boy_?" Izabela asked her little sister as they walked home.

"_No!_" Natalia exclaimed. "_Why are you saying that_?"

"_Well he's cute. And you were blushing a lot, just like right now_" she giggled.

"_I wasn't. I'm not_!"

_**At home…**_

Natalia took off her shoes and ran upstairs to hers and Izabela's room. She took a box out of her drawer and found an old book her great-grandmother gave her before she died. It was a book in English. A book to learn the English language. She tried to read a few words but she couldn't understand anything. But she would try. She would try because she had lied to her sister, she had a crush on this boy. The American Private.


	4. Chapter 4

_**The next week…**_

The guys have been on the battlefield for about fifty minutes, waiting for the enemy. Zachary and David were hiding in a trench, ready to attack. Every morning, Zachary had the intention to bring back all the guys he brought on the battlefield that day.

"They're here" David muttered. "Those motherfuckers" he added, holding his firegun.

"Wait until they're closer" Zachary whispered.

Someone probably moved too fast because the Germans started to shoot at them. Zachary held up his firegun and fired at them.

David shot at the Germans too, seeing them falling like flies around him. He used to play war with his friends when he was a kid but now, that wasn't a game at all.

Zachary heard a cry and turned around to see his friend in pain, a hand on his chest. Blood was flowing between his fingers, leaving his body. David's body felt numb and he started to get cold.

Zachary saw the enemy leave and looked around to see that two other guys had been shot. One in the leg, the other in the shoulder. He opened his bag and took his first-aid kit out of it. David was shaking in Zachary's arms.

"I don't want to die" he whispered, crying. "I just want to go home. I want to tell Catherine that I love her"

"HELP!" Zachary yelled. "PLEASE!"

He looked down at his friend. David's eyes were fixing him, no life in them. They seemed to plead for life, for help. He was surely dead in superhero. He had gave his life for his country.

The pain Zachary felt in his heart was so intense that he would've rather die. Fortunately, the others were alright, hurt but alright. Zachary just lost his first man.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Natalia had spent four hours per day in her room, trying to understand the English language, which seemed, at first, impossible. But now, she could use a few words. Salutations or simple stuff like that. The letters were in a mess and the verbs list was huge and full of different tenses. She was focusing on the present tense for now, which was more easy. What was tough was that she had nobody to help her. No one in her family spoke English and none of her friends understood. She didn't want to admit to anybody the reason why she wanted to learn English because they wouldn't understand. At night, when she couldn't sleep, she would study under her sheets at candlelight.

_**Three days later… **_

Zachary was walking in a certain neighborhood of Warsaw. The one where he met Natalia, twice. She wasn't at the general store 'cause he went in and asked. The man hadn't seen both of the girls in two weeks. He walked two hours and finally saw a brunette sitting in front of a house, reading an old book, all used up. The cover was ripped off and the pages were yellow-ish. The girl's hair were caught in the wind, which made her look even more beautiful. He didn't want to scare her or anything so he stayed on the sidewalk.

"_Hi_" he said.

She jumped and looked up to the sidewalk. When she saw him, she smiled big and put her book aside before walking to him.

"_How are you?_" Zachary asked, reading his notes.

He looked at her as soon as he finished his sentence.

"_I'm fine, thanks_" Natalia replied, blushing.

She opened the fence and motioned him to enter. They both walked to the house and they sat on the front stairs.

"I learn English" Natalia said, showing him her book. " I – "

She interrupted herself to look through it for what she wanted to say. Zachary smiled slightly, realizing what he looked like when he was searching his words to talk to her. The exception was that she was a hundred million times cuter than he was when he did so.

" I happy to see… you" she finished, looking up at him, as red as a tomato.

"I'm happy to see you too" Zachary said slowly for her to understand. "You are great" he added, talking about her learning skills.

Natalia looked through the pages of her book, searching for his last sentence. Zachary looked at her, slightly amused. God, she was cute.

Natalia finally found out what he had said and she smiled.

"Thank you" she said with an accent that could sweep you off your feet.

"You're welcome"

They talked for a while, mixing both their languages. They could, at least, understand each other a little bit since they've decided to learn the other language by themselves.

"You want to go for a walk?" Zachary asked slowly.

Natalia frowned. Now he was using too many words she didn't know. Zachary chuckled when he realized she didn't understand. He pointed at himself then at her and moved his fingers as if they were legs. Maybe it would be easier for her to understand. She looked at her house. She knew she couldn't leave without her sister or one of her brothers but nobody was home. She would probably be back by the time they would come back. She really wanted to go for a walk with Zachary.

"Yes" she answered.

She then nodded when she saw his confused face. He grinned and they walked away from Natalia's house.

After a while, Zachary took Natalia's hand in his as they kept talking in mixed polish-english, laughing at their own mistakes and helping each other in the pronunciation. Natalia didn't say anything and let her hand in his. The warmth of his hand was an amazing feeling. A boy never held her hand before and she didn't want to let go, she only wanted to enjoy the moment. Zachary's heart beat faster and he stroked the back of her hand with his thumb. He looked at her and smiled. A boyish smile. Like a little boy who just had his first bike. He looked down at their hands to be sure he wasn't dreaming. But everything was so real.

_**Two hours later… **_

Zachary stopped walking when they reached her house.

"_I hope I'll see you soon. I had a wonderful time_."

She nodded.

"_Me too_"

She walked to the front door, looking at him one last time before entering the house. Zachary left after being sure that Natalia was safely inside.

_**Inside Natalia's house… **_

Natalia took off her shoes, letting them in the middle of the way like she always did. She walked to the stairs. Holding her book.

"_Natalia Alicja Kovalska, come here right now_" her father shouted from the living room as she was about to run up the stairs to her room.

The young woman stopped in her tracks and closed her eyes for a second, knowing she was in deep shit. She walked down the few stairs she had already climbed and went to the living room, her eyes glued to the floor.

"_Where were you_?" her father asked, mad.

"_Outside_" she muttered, looking down.

She knew she had broken a rule.

"_With who_?"

"_No one_" she lied.

"_Exactly. You're perfectly aware that you can't leave this house alone. For the thousandth time, am I clear_?" he lectured his daughter.

Natalia simply nodded.

"_Up to your room, you stay there for the rest of the day, no dinner_" he ordered.

She obeyed her father and went up to her room. She grew up in a household where the rules had to be perfectly followed. The only problem was that Natalia had the need to defy them. Her parents were severe, really severe, and she probably had skipped fifty meals in her fifteen years of existence.

She lied down on her bed, indifferent at her father's screams. She thought about the wonderful afternoon she shared with Zachary. She was sure now, she was in love with him. And she would defy her father a thousand time if she had to.


	5. Chapter 5

Zachary walked back to the military base, smiling like an idiot. He would give anything to spend another afternoon like this one. He had realized, when he took Natalia's hand, that he was in love with her. He was completely crazy about her.

_**That night…**_

Zachary was outside with Scott, smoking a cigarette. They still had 30 minutes left before their curfew.

"I can't help it. Even when I try not to think about it. It's like the only think I can do is see, over and over again, the moment when he died, right in front of me."

"I know, it's terrible. I was so scared when I saw Drew being shot in the shoulder" Scott admitted.

He blew out some smoke and looked around.

"Hey man, someone's coming."

Zachary turned around and saw a figure in the dark. It was walking toward them. He could've recognized this walk from miles around. Those hair in the wind.

"It's fine, I know who this is"

The figure walked closer and her face was finally visible. Scott looked at her from head to toes a couple of times, his mouth half-opened.

"I'll see you inside" he said to Zachary before he smashed his cigarette on the ground and left.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Zachary exclaimed.

Natalia looked at him with puppy-dog eyes, confused at what he was saying. Zachary sighed. How was he supposed to translate that? She saw the anger in his eyes.

"_I just wanted to see you, I don't want you to be mad. I'm sorry_"

Zachary sighed again, completely lost.

"Window" Natalia stuttered.

"Are you aware of the danger?" Zachary shouted. "_Danger_" he repeated.

A tear rolled down Natalia's cheek and she took a step back, scared by his shouts. Zachary felt bad so he calmed himself.

"There are people around, everywhere, that just wait for people to get out at this hour. It's dangerous. Do you understand?" he asked, hoping that she would.

Natalia nodded. Zachary walked closer to her.

"_I'm sorry_" he apologized sincerely.

She looked up at him with watering eyes and swallowed. She was simply hoping that she wouldn't make any mistakes in what she had to say to him. This was also the reason she came here.

"I love you, Zachary" she whispered in her polish accent, looking into Zachary's eyes.

Zachary rested his hand on her cheek then leaned in and kissed her. Everything around him started to spin. The moment his lips joined Natalia's, his world had stopped. He only felt the butterflies in his stomach and his heartbeat increasing every second. He closed his eyes and kissed her again. He wiped the tear that was falling on her cheek and pulled away.

"_I love you, Natalia_" he murmured.

She smiled at him and sniffed softly, wiping away the rest of her tears.

"Come on, I'll get you home"

Zachary wrapped his arm around her and they walked to Natalia's house in the dark.

_**In front of Natalia's house…**_

Zachary kissed her.

"Goodnight" he whispered.

"_Goodnight_"

Natalia climbed back to her window and looked at Zachary when she was inside. He waved at her and walked back to the base, hoping he wouldn't be late for his curfew.

_**The next day… **_

Zachary walked to Natalia's house but didn't find her sitting in front of it like the day before. He looked up at her room's window and saw the pink silk curtain caught in the wind. He thought about Natalia's hair. He looked around him but saw nobody so he took a pebble on the ground and threw it to the window.

Natalia was sitting on her bed, folding the laundry when she heard a knock on her window. She frowned and heard it again. She stood up and walked carefully to the window. She looked outside and when she saw Zachary, she smiled big and waved her hand at him.

"Can you come down and walk?" he asked.

Natalia analyzed his words carefully then shook her head.

"_My father doesn't want me to see you again_"

"Oh…"

He lost his smiled. If her father said that, he should start to forget her right away.

"Alright, so I guess it's goodbye then?"

He looked at her for a while then walked away.

Natalia straddled over the window frame, put her right foot on the little roof upside the house's front door, then the left, and she jumped on the grass.

"Zachary" she called, running to him.

He turned around when he heard her call his name. She jumped in his arms and kissed him tenderly.

"I love you" Zachary whispered between two kisses.

"I love you too" she smiled softly.


	6. Chapter 6

_**A Month Later…**_

Natalia and Zachary had been seeing each other every day that Zachary wasn't on the battlefield. No one knew. Not even Natalia's friends or family nor Zachary's friends. This was their secret.

They were now sitting beside Natalia's house, their back against it.

"_There's something that I have to tell you_" Natalia began.

"_What is it_?"

"Promise me _that you're still gonna_ love me _after that_" Natalia said, mixing both English and Polish.

She still had some difficulties with long sentences.

"I promise" Zachary replied, a little concerned.

"I am a Jew" she breathed out nervously.

He looked at her for a minute in silence, waiting for something else.

"Is that _supposed_ to change anything?"

"You're not going to run away? _Or sell me out to the Nazis_?" she asked.

"Why would I do that? I love you, Natalia. I wouldn't do anything like that."

Zachary heard a crack and they both turned around. Izabela was standing there with her brother, looking at them.

"_Please, don't say anything_!" Natalia blurted out.

"_Who is he_?" Andrzej asked his little sister as he walked closer, followed by Izabela.

Zachary stood up and took a step back when he saw him walking fast toward him.

"_He's Natalia's friend_" Izabela answered for her sister, holding back her brother.

"_He's my boyfriend_" Natalia corrected.

Andrzej took a long look at Zachary then held out his hand.

"_Hey, dude, I'm Andrzej_"

Zachary took Andrzej's hand and shook it.

"_I'm Zachary_"

"_He's an American_" Izabela told Andrzej when she saw his confused face at Natalia's boyfriend's accent.

"_So you're a soldier_?" he asked.

Zachary looked at Natalia, awfully nervous, because he didn't understand anything.

"He ask if you a soldier" she translated the best she could.

Zachary was used to Natalia's little mistakes so he had no problems understanding what she was saying most of the time.

"_Oh… Yeah_" he replied, nodding at Andrzej.

"_Where did you learn to speak English_?" Andrzej demanded, looking at Natalia.

"_I learned it by myself but I'm not that good_"

"_You're really great_" Zachary reassured.

Natalia blushed.

"_Please, promise you won't tell any of this to mom and dad_" she pleaded her siblings.

"_I won't tell_" Izabela said.

"_You have my word_" Andrzej assured.

Natalia sighed and looked at Zachary.

"_Dinner is ready, better coming fast before daddy comes out and gets you_" Izabela warned as they both walked away.

"It's dinner" Natalia said to Zachary.

"Alright, hum, I'll see you tomorrow?"

Natalia nodded, smiling. Zachary kissed her softly then looked at her walking away.

_**Two months later…**_

Natalia had prepared a lunch and brought everything in the tree house behind her house, at the other side of the backyard.

"_There's a few sandwiches, fruits and lemonade. I did everything myself_" she told Zachary.

"It looks delicious"

What was great, now, was that they may be still had difficulties to use each other's language but they understood it perfectly. Zachary sat on the floor, against the wall. Natalia sat between his legs and rested her back against his chest.

"Can I taste one of these sandwiches? They really look delicious" Zachary said.

Natalia giggled and gave him one.

"I have to be careful not to drop some crumbs in your hair" he giggled as he took a bite of his sandwich.

"_You better be_" she warned, slapping his thigh playfully.

_**A few minutes later… **_

Zachary finished his sandwich and kissed Natalia's head.

"Thank you" he said.

He kissed her head again then slowly found his way to her neck. She tilted her head back in his chest and closed her eyes. Zachary rested his hand on Natalia's stomach, still kissing her neck. She put her hand on his and turned around, sitting herself on his lap, then kissed him passionately. He put his hands on her waist and brought her closer. Natalia ran her fingers in Zachary's hair and closed her eyes when she felt his lips on her neck again. She took his hand in hers. Zachary stopped himself as she did so, realizing what was going on. Natalia looked at him, confused at why he stopped.

"I can't do this"

"Why?"

"We're not supposed to have sex before marriage" he explained.

"_We weren't doing anything wrong. We were just kissing_"

"We say that but we both know where it's gonna end."

Natalia sighed loudly and stood up, picking up the remains of their lunch without even looking at him.

"Wait, we didn't even eat the grapes yet"

"I hate grapes!" she cut.

Zachary stopped talking but stood up to help her. She pushed him out of her way. She knew she wasn't supposed to have sex before marriage and she didn't have the intention to have sex just now. She was only enjoying Zachary's lips on her neck and his arms around her. She felt loved…

"_I'm sorry_" he apologized in Polish, walking to her.

He turned her around and kissed her softly but she pulled away immediately.

"_I'd like you to leave_" she said, tears in her eyes.

Zachary didn't understand why she was so mad at him for something so stupid.

"What's going on, beautiful?" he asked, worried, when he saw the tears in her eyes.

"_Germans want to bring all of the Warsaw Jews into some kind of ghetto_" she explained.

"I'll go see you in there, it doesn't change anything" he reassured her.

"You… _Only the Jews will be allowed in there_"

She shook her head when she realized he didn't understand. She started to cry softly and Zachary took her hand.

"Nothing's gonna take me away from you"

"_They're gonna kill you if you go in there. People that help or try to help the Jews are good for being hung_"

"If I can't see you then I'd rather die, Natalia"

"_I love you_" she mumbled, crying. "Forever"

"Me too" he whispered, holding her closer. "Me too…"

"_There's 363 000 Jews in Warsaw… It can't be right_…"

"We'll always be together" Zachary said, crying. " I never loved someone as much as I love you"

He kissed her temple and held her closer.


	7. Chapter 7

_**That night…**_

Zachary and Scott were sitting in the base cafeteria, all alone, and were talking.

"You see, I've met this girl" Zachary admitted to his friend.

"You mean that hot chick that was here the other night?" Scott asked.

"Yeah… And I'm absolutely crazy about her, you know… I think I'm actually in love with her"

"That's great, man!" he said with a smile. "What's with the long face?" he added when he saw that Zachary wasn't smiling at his own happiness.

"She's Jewish, Scott…"

"So?"

"The Nazis planned on bringing all the Jews in some sort of ghetto. You know, the kind where no one's 'invited', like a prison or something. I'll never get to see her again."

"Then what are you still doing here, you idiot?" Scott exclaimed.

Zachary frowned.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Go ahead, get her out of there"

With that, he started to laugh loudly as if everything was just a joke. Zachary gave him a look and stood up, so angry that his chair fell over. He walked away, pissed off. Scott stopped laughing and ran after him.

"Zachary!" he shouted for him to stop.

He turned around, still mad.

"You know it won't last, man. We told you when we first got here: forget about the Pole girls!"

"I don't give a fuck!" Zachary yelled, pinning Scott against the wall. "I love this girl" he added, feeling tears coming to his eyes. "And I will kill any little thing that will dare hurt her. Do you understand that?"

"Whoa! Chill out, man. It's ok, I get it."

Zachary pushed him and walked outside to smoke a cigarette, all alone with his thoughts. He leaned against the wall. Silence. Peace. He heard an explosion in the distance and turned around. All he could see was smoke. His heart suddenly beat faster. Was Natalia alright? Was she safe in her bed? He wanted to be sure but he knew that if he went to check on her, he would be on the first flight for the United States the next morning. He tried to hear but it was too far away and he couldn't hear anything.

_**Three days later… **_

Zachary stopped in front of the little brown house where Natalia lived with her family. As usual, he threw a few pebbles to her window then she finally got out and used her 'escape way' to get to Zachary. She took his hand and they went to their usual spot, the side of the house. As soon as they were safely away from any sight, she kissed him softly, a smile on her lips.

"_I missed you_" she breathed.

"It's only been three days but… I missed you too."

"_Did you hear the explosion the other night?_"

"_Yeah, I was worried, I prayed for you to be alright_"

"_It was about ten streets from here. The house was shaking. Bella and I finished the night in the same bed, we were so scared_"

"At least you're both fine"

Zachary kissed her nose and she giggled.

_**A few hours later…**_

"I'm going back on the battlefield tomorrow" Zachary announced to his girlfriend. "I'll be gone for a week or so…"

"Oh…" she nodded sadly and looked away. "_You'll come back_?" she finally asked.

"_Of course I will_" he assured her.

"_Promise me you'll be careful out there_"

"_I promise_"

"I love you" she murmured, burying her face in his chest.

He kissed her forehead and held her closer, tighter. They stayed like this for a long time and Zachary pulled away. He kissed her for the last time and walked away. He turned around three times to be sure Natalia was alright and each time, she waved at him, a forced smile on her face.

_**Four days later, on the battlefield…**_

Scott was lying down in a trench with Zachary. Since David's death, Zachary was his new binomial. They were practically joined by the hips. Always together. Zachary had forgave him for the other night and it was like nothing happened at all.

Zachary had already lost two men today and it wasn't a great day. He suddenly felt a sharp pain in his left thigh. In a few seconds, his thigh was numb and he couldn't feel anything but an intense pain. He touched his thigh and looked at his bloody hand.

Scott ran to him and pushed him and himself in much deeper. He took a bandage out of his bag and tried to calm Zachary down. He struggled in pain, groaning.

"If you don't calm down, it will be worse!" Scott yelled to cover the loud noise of the fireguns. "Keep your eyes open, Zachary, look into my eyes" he instructed, pointing to his own eyes. "Keep your eyes open"

Everything seemed to be in slow motion and the pain Zachary felt was unbearable. Scott heard the Germans leave and helped Zachary to the nursery.

"Don't look away. My eyes, Zachary, look into my eyes. Don't you ever look away"

He tried to hold Scott's gaze but he could feel his eyes closing. He first saw black dots in random places. He blinked and saw his mother's face then Natalia's eyes.

"Hold on, man, we're almost there. Everything's gonna be fine, you're gonna be alright."

"N – Na…" Zachary muttered.

"You're gonna be alright" Scott repeated.

He hadn't heard his friend calling for the love of his life.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Two hours later, in the nursery…**_

Zachary woke up slowly, confused at where he was. He didn't remember anything until he felt the pain that was still present in his thigh. A sheet was covering his legs and he looked around, seeing other hurt soldiers. A nurse walked to him when she was that he was now awake.

"How are we feeling, Private Stephens?" she asked softly.

"Not too bad, I mean, it could be worse…" Zachary replied with a slight smile.

"Are you hungry? Is there anything I can do for you?"

"A glass of water would be great"

"Sure" she confirmed with a smile.

She took the glass on his bedside table and filled it with water before giving it to him.

"Here you go"

"Thank you"

Zachary took two long sips and put the glass back on the bedside table.

"Call me if you need anything, alright?"

"Alright… Wait, what's your name? If I have to call for you, I have to know your name…"

"Evelyn" she smiled. "Just call me Evelyn…"

He smiled back at her.

"Evelyn"

She turned around and walked away to another patient.

_**That night…**_

Natalia was lying down on her bed, awake. She couldn't sleep. She could hear Izabela's soft breath from the bed next to hers and also the fireguns in the distance. She thought of Zachary, wishing he was doing ok and that he would be back in one piece in five days. She was counting the days and there was already three days since he had left. Being far from him was the worst thing she had to go through in her entire life. As if anyone had taken the right to dig a hole in her heart. She was wondering what he felt when he was far from her. Did he miss her? Was he counting the days too? Did he even think about her? Maybe she wasn't as important as he let it appeared.

Her parents had forbid her to go out with boys. They had always told her that boys wouldn't be interested in her until she was 18. That it wouldn't be real to dream about things that wouldn't happen, that would simply broke her heart for no reason. That was why she never told them about Zachary. Anyway, her father would never allow her to date an American or simply a guy for that matter. She didn't understand why they were telling so stupid things. She was only 15 and she was in love head over feet with an 18-year-old boy that loved her back, or so he told her. Why would she have to wait three more years before living the most powerful and beautiful feeling in the entire world? It should be illegal to forbid people to love, even though they were still kids. Kids were allowed to love too.

She loved her family, very much, but it wasn't the same thing. Loving your family was natural, almost required. It was clearly impossible to hate the people you lived with 24/7 since the day you were born.

Falling in love with a boy was different. Natalia didn't plan to fall in love with Zachary. The first time she saw him, she thought he was beautiful and her heart had jumped in her chest. She had never felt that before. That day, she had lost control of her emotions. She didn't know if it was a good or a bad thing. The only thing she knew was that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him, even though she didn't know how much time she had left.

_**A month later…**_

Zachary had sent a few days less than a month at the nursery. Today was the day he could leave the white and cold place to go back to the military base with his friends. He couldn't go back to the battlefield yet because of his leg but it would be more exciting than here. He didn't know in which state he would find Warsaw or if he would see Natalia again. If she was still in Warsaw. He had promised her that he would come back but he didn't keep his promise.

He walked slowly to the cafeteria with his crutches. He sat there, alone with his thoughts. Should he go see Natalia? Would it be better if he'd never see her again? Scott was right, he shouldn't have attached himself to anything. He had warned him not to mess with the Pole girls and that was the first thing he did. Spending so much time away from her had helped him to think clearly about the situation. Him, in love with a Pole? He didn't understand why he got involved with her in the first place. Why did he go out that day? Why did he meet her? Why did he have to fall in love with her? He suddenly shook his head. How could he think that when every time he thought about her, his world stopped spinning? Natalia was the one.

He went to her house, struggling with the damn crutches and stopped in front of it.

"_Dinner's ready_!" Natalia's mother called from the kitchen.

A loud noise came from the stairs and three of her children appeared in the kitchen. Natalia's father sighed.

"_Natalia Alicja Kovalska, dinner's ready_!" he yelled for his youngest to come down. "_I won't tell you ten times_!"

The whole family waited for a noise or a word but there was nothing.

"_She's not hungry, papa_" Izabela said.

"_She's gonna have to eat someday, Bella_"

"_Her heart is broken_" she explained.

He looked at her, confused by her last comment. Izabela gulped. She couldn't betray her sister.

Natalia hadn't eaten anything in three days. Every time Izabela brought her something, she would let it rot on her bedside table. Natalia had cried a lot but now, she was giving her the silence treatment. Izabela tried to ignore her behavior but she was sad to see her sister like that. Zachary had destroyed Natalia's heart, taking good care of cutting it into pieces. From the bottom of her heart, she somehow knew that it was gonna end like this. Why a beautiful American like Zachary would care about Natalia? Or someone like them for that matter?

Natalia was lying down on her bed, her heart broken. She looked at the calendar. Twenty days. Twenty days that he was supposed to be back. What was hurting her most was that she didn't know. She didn't know if he was still alive. She didn't know if he simply didn't want to see her again. Maybe he wasn't in Poland anymore. She closed her eyes and a tear escaped. She heard a knock on her window and opened her eyes. She heard it again and stood up, walking to the window. She saw a masculine figure on the sidewalk, it was him…

Zachary saw a shadow behind the curtains.

"Natalia" he whispered, loudly enough for her to hear him.

Natalia ran a hand in her hair and held back the tears that were burning her eyes. She walked downstairs carefully, knowing her family was in the kitchen. She went out, taking care of closing the door very quietly. She walked to Zachary, tears flowing like a river on her burning red cheeks. She saw the crutches but wrapped her arms around him anyway. Zachary held her against him as best as he could and kissed her head.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" he breathed out a thousand times before kissing her softly.

"_You broke my heart_" Natalia cried softly, looking away.

"I know" he whispered, turning her face to him. "_I'm sorry_" he added, looking deeply into her eyes.

Natalia wiped her tears away and sniffed.

"_What happened to you_?" she asked, realizing he was walking with crutches.

"I got shot in the thigh, I was in the hospital for a month" he explained.

"_Does it still hurt_?"

"No, it's not. It's just that I can't walk on it for a while. You know, you're the last thing I saw before I passed out. And I know it might sound stupid but… I think you're the one that saved me. I lost a lot of blood and I could've died."

Natalia listened carefully everything he said and smiled softly when he finished.

"_Well I'm glad you're here. And also glad that you're fine_"

"_I missed you so much_" he whispered before crushing his lips onto hers.


	9. Chapter 9

_**A month later…**_

Days were counted before Natalia and her family would leave for the ghetto. She didn't tell Zachary though, she didn't want him to know the day she would be gone, probably forever.

At the military base, outside…

"How old is she?" Kevin asked Zachary.

"Fifteen" Zachary answered.

"Fifteen?" Scott exclaimed. "Dude, you're almost nineteen!"

"So what? There's no age for love, you know"

"Isn't it awkward sometimes?"

"No"

"How's it going with her?" Kevin demanded.

Zachary turned to Kevin.

"Good, it's going great" he simply answered.

"That's all? Come on, man, give us some details" Scott urged.

"What details?"

"Don't be shy!"

"I have nothing to say!" Zachary snapped.

"Someone's coming" Kevin whispered, throwing away his cigarette.

Zachary turned around and recognized Natalia's figure. He walked to her, mad at her for not listening.

"What are you doing here? I told you not to do that again!" he exclaimed.

"I can't live without you" she cried, afraid by his shouts.

He couldn't resist at her accent when she was speaking English.

"Without you… I don't…"

"You can't go out in the middle of the night, walking alone to get here and think I will react as if all of this is okay"

"I'm sorry" she muttered, looking down.

Zachary hugged her and smelled her hair.

"_It's the last time we're gonna see each other. I'm leaving tomorrow. I came to say goodbye_" she explained, sobbing.

Zachary's heart made a loop in his chest. It couldn't be the last time. He needed her and she needed him.

"_Come with me, we'll spend the night in the treehouse together_" she murmured.

"What? Sleep outside? No way, it's too dangerous"

"_Not as long as you're with me_" she said, looking deeply into his eyes. "_Please, I need to be with you_"

He sighed and looked around to be sure no one would see him. He took Natalia's hand and they walked away.

_**Thirty minutes later…**_

Zachary helped Natalia to get in the treehouse then followed her quietly. In the treehouse, there were already some blankets and pillows. The October night was chilly. There was an oil lamp in the corner. Natalia closed the door and shivered as she turned around. Zachary took off his coat and put it down on Natalia's shoulders. There was smoke escaping their mouths every time they breathed. They finally lied down under the covers. Natalia cuddled up against Zachary, searching for additional warmth. He wrapped his arms around her and held her closer. The light breeze turned off the lamp and it was suddenly so dark.

"_I'm scared_" Natalia whispered.

"Everything's gonna be fine. I'll get you out of there. Nobody's gonna take you away from me like that" Zachary whispered back.

Natalia cried softly for a while and Zachary calmed her down with a kiss. She put her hand on the back of his neck. He felt a hot flash running through his body. She added passion to their kiss and got closer to him, giving him indecent thoughts. Everything in his head was so confusing. They were young. Fifteen and eighteen years old. They had not the same religion. Most of all, they weren't married. But he was crazy about her. God would forgive him for a love sin.

"Why did you come so close?" he asked Natalia. "Why did you put your hand on my neck…"

"It's wrong but… _I'll confess first thing in the morning. I probably won't see you ever again and if I don't, I would like to give you my virginity_"

"Why do something that you'll regret? Love shouldn't be a sin. I don't want our love to be."

"_You're the first man that I loved and I don't want to love nobody else. I won't. Do you understand_?"

They looked at each other in silence for a long time.

"_Do the irreparable and make love to me, Zachary_" Natalia whispered.

Zachary was scared. Not to be ashamed of himself or anything but to take Natalia's virginity after only fifteen years of life. He didn't want to hurt her in any way either…

He gently took off the barrette that was holding her hair back. Her long locks fell on her shoulders and he stroked her cheek with his thumb.

Natalia was nervous. Her breath, along with her whole body, was shaking slightly.

"_Are you ok_?" Zachary asked.

"_Can I touch you too_?" she murmured, looking into his eyes.

"_Yes_"

He lifted up her skirt slowly, stroking his thigh as his other hand was stroking her hair. He kissed her softly to help her relaxing. Natalia unbuttoned his shirt, one button at a time, running his fingers on his chest. Zachary let out a few sighs. He was nervous too, his heart was beating so fast, he could have sworn it was about to come out of his chest. He took off Natalia's shirt then his. After a few minutes of exploration of their scared bodies, they were naked under the covers. They were feeling uncomfortable and were incredibly shy. They didn't know how exactly to do this and they knew anything about any sensations. He got on top of her, kissed her and softly, he entered her. Natalia cried out a little and let out a few tears.

"_It hurts_" she whispered.

Zachary stopped, never leaving her sight.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked, wiping her tears away.

"_It's alright… Don't stop_" she reassured.

He continued. Some people had told him that it was actually fun but the only thing he was thinking about was to not hurt Natalia. He had no fun at all. Maybe the first time wasn't supposed to be…

_**Three minutes later…**_

Zachary's pleasure was finally there but it didn't last more than two minutes, neither Natalia's. Their bodies weren't used to that kind of ecstasy, it was strong. He took Natalia in his arms, she was still trembling. After a few minutes of cuddling, they decided to try it again. This time wasn't as awkward as the first time. They were more comfortable and Natalia was moaning softly, whispering in Zachary's ear that she loved him. Zachary understood why they called it 'make love'. Their bodies were now one and he did it because he loved Natalia. That was probably why it was so magical. There was love…

They spent the rest of the night together, showing and telling that they loved each other.

_**The next morning, 6 am… **_

Zachary woke up after two hours of sleep and slowly woke Natalia up. She had to go back inside before anyone noticed that she was gone and so did he. They walked to the front of her house and he kissed her for the last time.

"_I love you_" she whispered, crying.

"I love you… I'll love you forever" he said, holding her closer and kissing her head.

A tear escaped his eye and fell in Natalia's hair. She stayed in his arms a few more minutes and she climbed to her window, crying her eyes out. Zachary waited for her to be safely inside then walked away, his hands in his pockets, a river of tears flowing down his cheeks. He turned around to see the little house one last time and finally went back to where he belonged; the military base.


	10. Chapter 10

**Warsaw, Poland, October 31, 1940**

The Kovalski family was walking, holding each their suitcases. They were walking into a crowd of people. People 'like them'. They were surrounded by the Nazis that were leading them to the right direction. It was cold outside but Natalia was still able to suffocate.

Natalia's mother turned around every two minutes or so to be sure that the four of her children were still behind her and her husband.

Izabela was holding her sister's shaky hand. They were both scared to death but Izabela tried to hide it just to reassure Natalia. Henryk and Andrzej were walking behind them to be sure that no one would tear their little sisters apart. The Nazis were yelling insults at them and Natalia was crying.

The walking gradually stopped and Natalia's father gave his kids and wife their papers to register themselves at the entrance.

"_Everything's gonna be fine_" he said, forcing a smile.

They waited for their turn to come and since Natalia was still under age, her mother walked with her to one of the officer standing there.

"Name?" he asked roughly in German.

Natalia looked at her mother with confusion and fear written all over her face. She didn't understand the German language and knew her mother did.

"_Your name, honey_" her mother whispered, scared.

Natalia looked at the officer.

"_Natalia_" she stuttered.

"Full name!" the officer yelled again in that strong language.

"_Natalia Alicja Kovalska_" her mother answered for her.

"I wasn't talking to you!" he shouted louder.

They both jumped and even though Natalia didn't understand, she simply repeated what her mother had just said, tears in her eyes. The Nazi asked for Natalia's mother's information and stamped something on both their papers before letting them in.

Natalia turned around and saw her sister walk to the officer with her father. She stood there, simply watching.

"_Natalia, we have to walk_" her mother said, taking her hand.

"_But… Bella. And Papa, Henryk, Andrzej…_"

"_We'll get together later, I promise_"

_**One hour later…**_

Two German soldiers brought Natalia's family in a seedy apartment block. Theirs was on the third floor. When the Germans left, slamming the door, Natalia jumped then looked at her new home with desolation. She had the sense that rats were already living in there. Her mother burst into tears when she saw in what they were going to live. Henryk hugged her.

"_It's gonna be alright, mom. We'll get through this_"

"_I guess we'll have to sleep in the living room… Some of you can occupy the kitchen_" Natalia's father said, realizing there was no bedrooms.

_**That night…**_

Natalia was lying down on the living room floor with her siblings. They left the couch to their mother and her poor back. Their father was sleeping in the kitchen. Natalia couldn't stop moving. She was scared and her 'bed' wasn't comfortable at all. Her stomach was rumbling, she hadn't ate anything since the morning but more than anything, she missed Zachary.

"_Quit it, you're gonna wake up mom_" Izabela whispered.

Natalia said nothing. She cuddled up to her sister and started crying. Izabela wrapped her arm around Natalia and stroke her tangled hair.

"_I miss him_" Natalia murmured. "_I feel weak, like all my courage is gone_"

"_He's with you… you keep him in your heart_"

Zachary had told her the same thing but she didn't believe it. That way he couldn't kiss or hold her. She couldn't look into his eyes or smell his scent. She thought about last night and closed her eyes. It should never have ended. She cursed the sun that rose this morning. She would've stayed in Zachary's arms forever. But she couldn't talk about this to anyone because it was a sin. She wasn't allowed to lose her virginity before marriage. And her father would never have accepted to give his youngest daughter's hand away to a soldier, an American soldier. Her father could torture her all he wanted, he would never stop her from loving Zachary.


	11. Chapter 11

_**The next morning…**_

Natalia left the apartment with Izabela and Andrzej to buy some food with the few zlotys they had left for their family. They bought a bag of potatoes, some bread and peas too. They should be good for a whole week if they were being reasonable.

On their way back home, Andrzej got himself a little job on the street. He would sell books on the sidewalk for entire days just to make the minimum of money. He ran home to tell the good news to his parents as his sisters walked slowly behind him. Natalia took Izabela's hand.

"Come on, it's time to get out of here"

"To go where? If we step out of here we're dead, remember?"

"We only have to deny ourselves"

"What?" Izabela exclaimed. "How dare you? It's a sin to deny your religion!"

"I sinned already, one more time won't kill me"

Izabela looked at her sister with disgust. She sinned and didn't confess herself. And now, she wanted to deny herself as a Jew?

"I'm not going anywhere and neither do you. There's gonna be others, you know, forget about him!"

Natalia opened her mouth to say something but closed it immediately. A big lump formed inside her throat and tears filled her big brown eyes. She ran in the opposite direction, leaving her sister behind.

"Natalia! Come back here!"

Natalia ran faster, bumping into everyone there. She wanted to be away from all of this. Away from the people that were holding her back from the life she really wanted. Big tears were falling down her cheeks and she fell on the ground. Her head knocked on the sidewalk and she passed out.

_**A few minutes later…**_

Natalia opened her eyes slowly after she felt cold water falling on her face.

A woman was sitting beside her, holding a bottle of water.

"Are you alright miss?" she asked when she saw that Natalia's eyes were open.

The young woman nodded to reassure the old lady that she was fine. She helped Natalia to get up and gave her two or three gulps of water before asking her where she lived. Natalia wasn't sure but they finally found the apartment block as they walked around. Andrzej was waiting for her in front of the block, pacing impatiently. He thanked the lady that brought his sister back and she left.

"Don't you do that ever again! You think you can run away like that? You scared the shit out of us" he lectured.

"Oh shut up already"

Andrzej got even more angry.

"Wait 'til you're up there, dad's gonna kill you"

Natalia rolled her eyes and walked to the door. She was used to be yelled at by her father. She surely wasn't scared of him anymore. She was used to be in trouble because she loved trouble. She lived for trouble.

_**Upstairs…**_

"No dinner for you tonight, young lady. No diary, book, or any other things that could entertain you" her father punished.

Taking away her diary was like taking away a part of her soul. She had to write in it every day. It was, starting now, her only friend.

"You won't cut her out on dinner, Krzyszrof" Natalia's mother said to her husband. "She hasn't eat anything in two days"

This was true and her sorrow seemed to eat for two.

"Alright" he resigned himself. " But no diary, book, and all this stuff. You stay in here for a week"

"A week? But… Papa!" Natalia shouted.

"Shall we go for two?" he asked.

Natalia pouted and crossed her arms, holding herself to add anything else and get in more trouble than she already was.

Her parents' friends always said to them that Natalia looked like an easy child. Calm and perfect. Every time, they simply laughed to their faces. If Natalia was an angel, they wondered what a devil child was like. She always asked for too much attention and since she was a kid, she looked for trouble all the time.

_**Later, at dinner…**_

The six members of the Kovalski family were sitting at the kitchen table and were saying grace before eating their meal. Natalia kept her eyes open and simply muttered some of the words, swinging her feet back and forth under the table. Her father opened his eyes when he heard her murmurs and he saw her looking at the ceiling, moving her legs under the table. He said nothing but he was deceived by her attitude. He knew she couldn't live like that. Natalia wasn't someone that you could throw somewhere and expect her to stay there against her will and do nothing about it. They finished the prayer and everybody opened their eyes.

"Let's eat"

Natalia crushed her face in her plate and ate everything in a few minutes, not bothering to use the fork and knife that were beside her plate. Everybody was looking at her, shocked by what they just saw.

"Is someone going to left something?" she asked, looking around at them.

"You want another potato, honey?" her mother demanded. "I can have another one ready for you" she added before she could answer.

She stood up from her chair.

"Nobody's going to have more of anything" her father exclaimed. "Especially you" he clarified, pointing at Natalia. "Money is flying out the window and we have to keep food as long as we can"

Natalia looked down. Her mother sat back on her chair. Nobody spoke. The silence was uncomfortable and no one dared to talk. She planted her fork into the potato that was in her plate and put it down in Natalia's.

"Mom, you have to eat" Natalia said, pushing her plate away slightly.

"Eat" she simply responded, tearing up.

"It's yours… I can't…"

"You have to eat, mama, it's important"

Henryk was so hungry, just like his sister, and he would've died to eat this potato but he simply couldn't because their mother shouldn't deprive herself for them.

"I'd rather give it to Talia so she has enough to eat. I'm not important" their mother declared, bursting into tears.

"I won't eat it… I can't do that…"

She took the potato back and gave Natalia her piece of bread. Natalia shoved it inside her mouth and ate it all up in one chew.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Zachary was sitting in the cafeteria with his friends and while they were talking, he simply moved his food in his plate with his fork, not bothering to eat it. Natalia has been gone for two days now and he hadn't eat anything but the half of a sandwich. He couldn't stop thinking about her but mostly about the night they had spent together. He didn't know if he would be able to see her again and it was killing him.

"You should eat, man" Scott said, sitting beside him.

"I'm not hungry" Zachary simply replied.

"There's millions of girls out there, you'll find the one someday" Kevin pointed out.

"You don't understand!" Zachary exclaimed. "She was the one, dude, it was her, and I let her go" he explained as he lent his fist on the table.

He got up and walked outside. He sat against the brick wall and buried his face in his hands before he started to cry profusely.

"Hey" Scott announced himself. "I'm sorry about what happened inside" he continued, sitting beside him.

Zachary shrugged.

"I'm gonna help you to get her out of there, alright?"

"Don't say things you don't intend to do"

"No, I'll do it. It's just that I don't know where to start…"

"Even if we tried… We're nothing against the Nazis. They're gonna take her someplace else before we even figure something out."

"If you're negative like that then you won't see her again. Do you want her or not?"

"Of course I want her! I just know that if I had too much expectations, in the end it will hurt me"


	12. Chapter 12

**Warsaw, Poland, March 1941**

_**A year and a half later…**_

Natalia hadn't see Zachary since the day she left for the ghetto. She didn't forget him. Where she was, there was simply no time for love. Too much stuff was happening in one day that you couldn't think about anything but yourself. She didn't know if he could even remember her, the little girl that was crazy about him. Somebody else must have taken her place. A woman, not a girl. Maybe he was gone to the United States. As she recalled, he has been in Poland for two years now. She didn't know I long he was supposed to stay in the country. She was now 17 years old. Every day, she was moving forward to death, trying to convince herself otherwise. There were bodies at random places in the street, sometimes people that she knew. She was so scared that she barely left the apartment anymore. Today, though, she had to cause Andrzej was sick and he couldn't go on the street and sell some books. In other words, Izabela and Natalia had to stay up all day long, waiting. No one bought books because no one had money and no one cared. People were starving to death. Natalia's family hadn't eat anything in three days and Natalia could feel herself crushing.

"_Ughh_" she whined for the 95734763th time of the day.

"_Will you stop complaining_?" Izabela said, annoyed. "_It won't change anything_"

"_Anything. That's what we have; nothing. I'm freezing_" Natalia admitted.

It started to snow lightly and Natalia sighed. She hated the snow, the cold, the winter. Especially right now.

"_Can I just… walk around so I can warm my feet_? I'll be back in a few and you'll go"

"_Sure. Don't go too far though_"

"_I won't_" Natalia promised.

She walked away, not looking in front of her 'cause she was obsessed with the fruits stalls on the other side of the street. What would she do to taste one of them…

She bumped into someone and fell on the ground. She looked up and she recognized what was on the guy's sleeve.

"_Oh my God, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry_" she repeated a trillion times.

"Whoa, stay calm, miss" the young man said in German as he helped her up.

He was wearing a SS uniform and when his eyes met hers, everything stopped. He smiled and when he realized people were looking, he pushed her slightly but he looked at her as if saying he was sorry. He took her arm roughly and brought her in an alley as everyone stared.

"_I'm really sorry Sir_" she apologized, trembling under his touch.

He pushed her against the wall. He could see that she was scared to death. He took his gun out of his belt. Natalia was crying hysterically. She really was sorry. She hadn't seen him on the sidewalk. If she did, she would've stepped away on the street, where she was supposed to be.

"_Don't do this, please. Please, I'm sorry…_"

The soldier put his gun in a vertical position and shot. He could hear screams from the street. He did that so nobody would suspect anything. The last thing he wanted was to harm this poor girl.

"You should watch your steps, be careful" he warned in German.

Natalia shook her head nervously, still confused at what had just happened.

"_I can't understand what you're saying_"

"_You should watch your steps, be careful_" he repeated in Natalia's language.

She smiled and apologized one last time.

"_You can go_" he told her.

He looked at her walk away. She turned around to look at him and smiled slightly. He nodded his head one time to say goodbye. Natalia blushed and disappeared around the corner. She walked back to her sister and saw that she was with Florian, their neighbor from upstairs. He had a crush on her but Izabela wouldn't believe her sister when she told her so. Natalia said nothing to interrupt their conversation. She was thinking about the German soldier that just spared her life. He sure was cute. He looked older than Zachary but he had the same blue eyes. This was what Natalia fell for Zachary in the first place. His eyes.

"_Hi, Natalia_" Florian greeted.

She snapped out of her thoughts and smiled at him.

"_Hey_!"

"_Is it ok if I go for a walk with Florian_?" Izabela asked her sister.

"_Sure, no problem_"

_**Later that night…**_

Natalia was in the bathroom and was writing about her day in her diary. She locked the door so no one would enter and try to take a peek at what she was writing. She didn't write about Zachary this time, which was unusual. She simply talked about the fear she had and what happened with the young man.

"_Natalia! Get out of there! I've been holding for 20 minutes_" Henryk yelled from the other side of the door, banging on it with his fist.

She jumped and quickly closed her diary before locking it. She opened the door and pushed away her brother on her way out.

"_Giant idiot_!"

"_Shut up, little brat_!"

Natalia stuck her tongue out at him as he slammed the door shut to her face.

"_I hate you_" she shouted.

"_The feeling's mutual, ugly face_" he snapped back.

_**A month later…**_

"_Where are you going_?" Natalia's father asked her when he saw that she was wearing a dress and that her hair was falling on her shoulders.

"_See some friends_" she lied.

"_I can tell when you're lying, Natalia. Where are you going_?" he asked for the second time.

She sighed.

"_Alright, alright… Marek invited me over at his apartment. We're gonna hang out_" she lied again.

"_Marek_?" he asked, confused by this unknown name.

"_The boy that lives around the corner. We're good friends_" she explained, not knowing herself who the hell was Marek.

"_Alright then… Don't be late, I want you back here at 6 o'clock sharp_" he said, suspicious at his daughter's words.

"_I promise, papa_"

And with that, she was out the door. Once she was on the sidewalk, she looked up at their apartment and saw her father looking down at her from the window. She waved at him then turned around the corner and lost his sight. She entered an old house, practically all destroyed. This was their meeting place because these secrets visits were dangerous for the both of them. She heard a noise behind her and turned around quickly to see him.

"_Hi beautiful_" his masculine voice said.


	13. Chapter 13

Natalia smiled and walked closer to him.

"_You scared me_" she giggled.

"_I'm sorry_" he apologized with a smile.

He wrapped his arms around her and kisser her softly. She smiled against his lips. She pulled away and buried her face in his chest, enjoying his strong arms around her. She ran her hands on his sides and realized his gun wasn't attached to his belt like it was supposed to. She looked up at him and saw that he wasn't wearing his hat either.

"_I would've changed into something else but I can't_"

"_Josef, can I ask you something_?" she questioned as they sat against the wall.

"_Yes, of course_" he said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"_Why did you join the Nazis_?"

"_My father_…"

She looked at him, confused.

"_I don't know how to say this… It's like he had a brainwash or something. Everything Hitler says is right and any of his wishes should be fulfilled. If you want my opinion, he's an ass_" he whispered.

If someone had heard him say that, he would've been dead.

"_And my father wants me to be the perfect German, you know, the perfect Aryan. I'm typical German. Blonde with blue eyes. You know, I saw a lot of my friends leave, knowing they wouldn't come back just because they were Jews. I would never hurt anybody. Nobody deserves what you're going through_"

"_Is your father also in the army_?" she asked.

He nodded.

"_He's in Germany though_"

"_Thanks for being honest_" she said, cuddling up to him.

It might sound strange but every time she was with Josef, she couldn't help but think about Zachary. And how she felt when she was with him. She was missing him, of course, but she was still waiting. He promised her he would save her from the Germans but he still hadn't come. She knew, though, that she would never forget him. She would always love him even if she would end up finishing her life with somebody else.

She spent the rest of the afternoon with Josef and they talked about a lot of things.

"_I should go home, it's 5:30_" she announced.

"_I'll see you in two weeks then_?"

He was going to spend two weeks in Germany with his mother and then he would come back in Poland.

"_Do you really have to go_?"

"_I haven't seen my mother in months and she insisted for me to come_"

"_Two weeks is a very long time, I'm gonna miss you_" she said with a pout.

"_I know, me too. But hey, I'll bring you something back, alright_?"

"_Okay_"

She kissed him and left the house after saying goodbye.

_**Meanwhile…**_

Zachary was walking beside the wall that divided the ghetto from the real world, holding a box. Suddenly, he saw a boy getting out from a hole at the bottom of the wall.

"Hey buddy" Zachary said, hoping the kid was speaking English.

The kid looked up at him.

"Do you have something to eat?" he asked.

Zachary was relieved to know that he could talk fluently with the little boy.

"Sure, there" he said, giving him the apple that was in his pocket.

"Thank you, Sir" he thanked, taking a bite of his apple.

"Hey would you – Do you know a girl named Natalia Kovalska?"

"Yes, I know her. She used to babysit me. She's my sister's friend"

"You think you could deliver this to her?" Zachary asked, showing him the box he was holding.

"Only if you give me the chocolate bar that's in your pocket" he negotiated.

"Sure"

Zachary took the chocolate out of his pocket and gave it to him, along with the box.

"You have to promise me that you will give it to her"

The boy nodded and heard a gun shot. He said nothing and disappeared under the brick wall. He ran to the Kovalskis' apartment and knocked on the door, breathless.

Izabela opened it.

"_Hi_!"

"_Is Natalia home_?" he asked.

"_Yeah, wait a minute. Natalia_!" she called, turning around. "_There's somebody for you at the door_!"

"_Coming_!"

Natalia walked to the door and when she saw Dominik, she couldn't help but hug him.

"_I had to deliver this box to you_" he said, showing her the box.

"_Thank you… Who's this from_?" she asked as she took it out of his hands.

"_I don't know_" he shrugged. "_I have to go, I'm late_"

He ran out of the block and Natalia closed the door. She ran to the bathroom. She didn't want her sister to snoop. She didn't know what was in the box but she surely knew she wanted to discover it by herself. The only thing that was on the box was her name. Nothing else. She opened it and saw a bunch of letters, all of them separated in each an envelope. She opened the first one quickly and read.

"_Dear Natalia,_

_If only you knew how much I miss you. My heart burns a little more every day without you. I would do anything to see you again but I don't know what to do and how to do it. The only thing that keeps me close to you is to write these letters, even though I don't know if you're going to read them someday. It helps me to describe the feelings that destroy me inside. You know I would do anything for you but you also know that it's not easy in this war period. I'm not scared for myself because die for you, I would do it anytime, but I'm scared for you. I love you enough to get you out of this nightmare but I love you too much to throw you in the 'outside' danger. But you have to believe me when I say that the only thing I want is to bring you and your family back in America and then marry you so we can live together forever. I loved a girl once, back in New Orleans, about three years ago, but I never loved somebody like I love you, Natalia. Those other girls were girls I liked. I wasn't in love with them. I am in love with you. I brood at night. I'm worried about you, about where you are, if you are okay, if you are still alive. You think that one day I'll have you for myself? I want to grow old with you… Since the night we spent together, I can't get a good night of sleep. I cry like a baby and I pray my father, every night, so he looks after you. Someday, I'll ask you a question and I truly hope that 'yes' is going to be your answer because I love just like the violin loves the music. I can't keep living without you, I'm gonna die if I lose you forever. I'm crazy about you and I always will be. _

_Zachary xxx_"

Natalia swallowed and wiped the tears on her cheeks. She took the second letter quickly and then a third one. The letters were all beautiful and she was crying more at each love confession he had wrote. Even if they couldn't run away together, she would survive. She would survive because love was stronger than hatred. And that's what the Germans had against the Jews; hatred.

_**A few weeks later…**_

The summer was almost over and Natalia felt the urge to see Zachary. Every time she met with Josef, it was the same thing; her heart was pounding because, yes, she admitted it, she was in love with him. But there was always this guilt, she felt like she had forgotten Zachary and everything that they had shared. She had given him the most important thing she had. And he was the first boy that ever loved her. Josef, though, was someone special to her and she loved every secret second she spent with him. He always made her feel like she was the most beautiful girl in the entire world and he treated her like an adult and not like a child like everybody else did.

Natalia was walking beside the brick wall that separated this horrible place from the real Warsaw. She avoided the dead bodies at her feet, here and there in the street. She was crying. She was thinking about Zachary but most of all about what would happen to her. Would she end up like the people at her feet? Would she survive at this terrible situation they were living in? She was missing Zachary terribly, it was indescribable. Fortunately, there was Josef. He helped her to think about something else. She had fallen for Josef, hard, but she knew that she would never love someone as much as she loved Zachary.

He was her first love.

She walked closer to the wall, leaned against it and waited for a while. There was nothing but silence.

"_Zachary_" she muttered, sobbing.

She let herself slide against the wall, falling on the ground. She lied there, surrounded by lifeless bodies, and cried all those tears she kept inside for so long.


	14. Chapter 14

_**Later that day…**_

Natalia walked into the old house and saw that Josef was already there, waiting for her. She jumped in his arms and kissed him tenderly. She hadn't seen him in a whole week. Josef pulled away after a minute.

"Ich liebe dich" he said, breathless.

Natalia smiled because she understood what he said. She loved him too, so much. She kissed him again. Josef put her down while kissing her and rested his hands on the small of her back, bringing her closer. Natalia smiled against his lips as he did so. She ran her hand on his chest then pulled away from the kiss. He pushed her hair behind her shoulder and began to suck on her neck. She tilted her head back and sighed loudly, fisting Josef's hair.

_**Later, in a bedroom of the house…**_

Natalia was sleeping, her head on Josef's chest. A white sheet was the only thing that covered her naked body. Josef was looking at her sleep, stroking her hair.

Twenty minutes later, she opened her eyes and smiled when she saw Josef looking at her. She looked deeply into his eyes and pecked his lips.

"_What time is it_?" she asked with a sleepy voice.

"_Four o'clock_"

"_I'm late_!" she exclaimed.

She got up and took her clothes up from the floor. She dressed up and stole a kiss from her lover before leaving.

_**At the apartment…**_

She ran inside, ready to be yelled at by her father, but he simply looked at her and kept quiet.

"_I'm sorry_"

He said nothing. Or he was giving her the silence treatment or he simply was annoyed to always repeat the same damn things. Natalia took her diary in her suitcase and walked to the bathroom. She sat on the floor after being sure that the door was locked.

_August 14__th__, 1942_

_Dear Diary, _

_Today, I saw Josef for the first time in a week. He hugged me, so tight, that I realized how much he loves me. How much I love him. Then, we made love. In the little room, upstairs, nothing but he and I seemed to exist. He was so sweet and delicate, he kept whispering in my ear. My name or simply that he loved me. I wasn't saying anything but I felt the same way. I had never felt something closer to erotic in my life, it was perfect. I love Josef Bergmann. I love him with all my heart even though I shouldn't. It's dangerous but I've never been afraid. Josef Bergmann was the man that was destined to me. _

Natalia's mother knocked on the door from the other side.

"_Talia, honey, dinner's ready_"

"_Coming in a minute_"

She put the pen between the pages she was writing on and left her diary on the sink. She would finish this after dinner.

_**After dinner…**_

Natalia was washing the dishes with her mother as her brothers and father were playing cards. Izabela was nowhere to be seen.

"_Where's your sister_?" Natalia's mother asked her.

"_I don't know_" she shrugged.

Her chore done, Natalia let the cloth on the counter and walked through the living room to reach the bathroom, where she would finish her diary entry.

Just like that, coming out of nowhere, Izabela slapped Natalia's face. Natalia didn't know why she did this nor what was going on but she slapped her back. Then, they started a cat fight.

"_Slut!_" Izabela yelled in her sister's face, twisting her arm.

"_Oww!_" she fought back. "_You bitch!_"

Their mother ran to the room as soon as she heard the two girls screaming names at each other. She saw them fight in the middle of the living room.

Izabela pulled on Natalia's hair. Natalia elbowed her sister's stomach.

"_Stop!_" their mother ordoned.

The girls didn't hear her. They were still kicking and pushing each other.

"_Natalia Alicja Kovalska!_" she yelled, assuming it was her fault.

"_She slapped me!_" she defended herself, pointing at her older sister.

"_You deserve worse!_" Izabela snapped at her.

"_Stop it now! I don't want to see that ever again, am I clear_?"

Natalia said nothing, neither did Izabela. Their mother left the room and Natalia looked at her sister as if she was about to kill her. Izabela pushed her on the wall and walked to the kitchen. Natalia walked to the bathroom where she found her journal opened where she left it. How dare Izabela could read her diary? How stupid she was for letting it lying there, unlocked? Izabela had read everything. From the first day she met Zachary until now. She read everything about her relationships with two soldiers. Zachary and Josef. An American and a German Nazi. She committed the same sin twice but she didn't regret anything.

_**Two hours later… **_

Izabela walked into the living room and saw Natalia already laying down on the floor, under a thin sheet. She took her own on the couch and walked to the opposite side of the room. Natalia was still awake and when she heard her sister walk as far as possible from her, she felt a hot tear falling from the corner of her eye.

"_If you think I'm still gonna trust and love you after what you did to us, keep dreaming Natalia! You should've thought about what you did, you wouldn't have to cry tonight_" Izabela clarified when she heard her cry. "_You're so pathetic_"

"_I love him!_" she said crying. "_I love him, Bella!_"

"_You can't_!" she shouted as she walked to her.

"_It's like Florian. You and Florian, you love each other. Why wouldn't I have the right to be in love with a boy too_?"

"_He's not a boy, he's a monster!_"

"_Shut up, bitch_!" she exclaimed.

"_And I can see you're starting to become one too_" she ended, holding herself back from spitting in Natalia's face. "_You're not my sister anymore… We'll never be sisters again_"

_**The next day… **_

Izabela and Natalia were cleaning the kitchen in silence. They didn't talk to each other since last night.

Suddenly, the door opened with a loud noise and everybody turned to it. Two Nazis stood there and ordonned them to pack their bags. Fifteen kilos per person were allowed. They left as quickly as they came in and repeated their routine in each apartment. Natalia ran to her suitcase and opened it. She looked at her sister that was next to her and she realized she was crying. Izabela looked up at her as if she was a monster. She wanted her to realize what kind of people were the Nazis. Natalia ignored her and filled her suitcase with the most important things. A few clothes, Zachary's letters and her diary.

When they were all finished, they went to the front of the block, the six of them, and waited for everybody to be there. As soon as the whole block population was on the sidewalk, they had to climb in the back of a truck. After fifteen minutes, they were left in a place that looked like a cage. There were already a bunch of people there. There was a barbed wire fence all around. They finally found an empty spot and all sat there. They were told to wait so they did even though the sun was terribly hot that day…


	15. Chapter 15

**Warsaw, Poland, August 16****th**** 1942**

The train station was filled with people as if it was an ants' nest. Everybody was pushing others, screaming, holding onto each other. Natalia was holding her mother's hand tightly. They were trying to stay all together but that seemed impossible with all those people surrounding them. They lost sight of Henryk and their father. Natalia looked around and saw people being tossed into the wood wagons. Suddenly, two strong hands took her away from her family and threw her in a wagon. She freaked out for a second before she saw her mother, brother and sister being thrown in just after her.

As soon as the wagon was full, entirely full, of people, two Nazis closed the door loudly and locked it. It was dark, so dark, and there were no windows, just a few hatches for ventilation. They were so crammed and everybody was screaming like wounded animals. Natalia was crying in silence, holding her mother's hand.

"_It's going to be okay, honey_" her mother whispered, stroking Natalia's hair. "_They're taking us to a nicer place_" she said, trying to convince herself of that lie.

"_A monster_" Izabela murmured into her sister's ear, making her cry even more.

The heat was unbearable and they could barely breathe because they were so packed in that wagon. The train moved forward after fifteen minutes or so. All the suitcases were left behind. No suitcases had been allowed in the wagons and the Germans had told them they would be in a separate one. That was a lie, they were all on the platform. Every word of Natalia's diary was going away each second. She was heading to death.

_**The next day…**_

They were still in the train. Their legs were hurting by standing so much and their stomachs were pleading for food. People were calm now, nobody was screaming anymore. Natalia's mother was holding her hand, her head resting on her shoulder. She couldn't feel her legs anymore, they were so numbed.

Natalia tried to convince herself that her sister was wrong but she knew that she must have been right at some point. Why did Josef let these Nazis bring her in that train? Why did he let her go without a word?

But she still loved him. She knew, deep inside, that he would somehow help her. Zachary had told her the same thing and now she was standing in a wood wagon, surrounded by people she didn't know. A strange smell began to fill the little bit of air they had and she wondered if that was like that in every wagon. She never loved being in the dark. And it was so damn dark in that train. The little traps on the side of each wall weren't big enough to let in a strong light, much less help them to breathe. There wasn't enough oxygen for everybody to share. The only sounds that could be heard were the low voices of people talking to their family and the sound of the wheels on the tracks.

"_I can't feel my legs anymore_" Natalia's mother murmured.

"_It's ok, mom, we're gonna get down that train soon, then you'll be able to rest_" Andrzej said as he felt his sisters glare at him.

"_I need water. Water_" she continued, looking at Natalia. "_Talia, water_"

"_Mama_" Izabela said to her mother, trying to ease the pressure she was pushing on Natalia's shoulder.

"_Talia_" she pleaded, ignoring Izabela and what she just said. "_I love you, Talia_" she breathed.

She fell gradually to the ground, letting go of her younger daughter's hand. Despite her weakness, Natalia screamed in a high-pitch tone. She tried to bend down to help her mother to get up but Andrzej held her back. He knew that she wouldn't stand back if she bent. Unlike his sisters, he knew what was going on at his feet. Natalia, along with Izabela, started to cry. Andrzej wrapped his arms around his two sisters and hugged them.

"_Shh_" he whispered, trying to calm them down.

His eyes were filled with tears but he had to stay strong for them.

"_I'm so scared_" Natalia sobbed. "_I want to go home_"

"_It's alright, baby girl, as long as we stick together_"

"_Don't let go of me_"

"_I won't_" he said as he felt hot tears fall from his eyes. "_I won't, I promise_"

Natalia closed her eyes and hugged her brother. To Andrzej, Natalia was a real gem and he wouldn't let anybody hurt her, never.

The Kovalski family had just lost one of its members; Karolina Kovalska.

_**A few hours later…**_

The train finally stopped and they heard a loud noise, they were opening the doors. The noise was coming closer and closer and their door opened. Natalia squinted her eyes at the daylight then she heard the Nazis yelling for them to get out of the train. They used terms like 'filthy rats' and 'useless of the human race'. Natalia was horrified when she saw lifeless bodies fall from the wagons, including her mother's. She stood there and looked at her.

"_Come, Natalia_" Andrzej said as he took her hand. "_We have to go_"

They walked for a mile or two and they found Henryk and their father that had been thrown in the wagon before theirs. When they stopped walking, the Nazis yelled for the men to separate from the women and children. Natalia panicked.

"_No, Andrzej, no you promised_" she said as her brother did what they were told.

Andrzej wrapped his sister in his arms and kissed her head before being pulled away by a German. Izabela wrapped her arms around Natalia to hold her back from running away.

"_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_" Natalia yelled, struggling in Izabela's arms. "_YOU PROMISED!_" she added, crying hysterically.

Everybody was leaving her. Everybody was lying to her. Andrzej tried to get away from the soldier's grip when he heard Natalia's screams but he couldn't do more than just look at her and see the tears streaming down her face.

"_I love you_" he shouted, but she didn't hear him.

_**Later that day…**_

The men were gone and the women and children were standing in lines. A colonel was walking in front of them, stopping at each person to ask questions. He stopped in front of Natalia. She had never seen somebody as scary and cold as him. She was hoping he would ask the same questions he did for the others because she understood it perfectly. Josef had helped her a little bit with that language that she hated.

"Name" the Nazi asked her with a voice that gave her goosebumps.

"_Natalia Alicja Kovalska_" she stuttered, trying to hide her fear.

"Age?"

"_Eighteen years old_"

"Birth date?"

"_June 17, 1924_"

He looked at her from head to toes and caught a glimpse of her gold bracelet.

"Give me your bracelet" he asked.

Natalia panicked inside because she didn't understand what he was asking. He pointed her wrist. It was the bracelet her grandmother gave her at her 14th birthday. She had never taken it off but she was so scared that she took it off in a second and gave it to the man.

"Right!" he shouted, tilting his head to the right.

She walked to the right side where other people were already waiting and hoped that her sister would be send there too. The soldier stopped in front of Izabela and asked her her name.

"_Izabela Helena Kovalska_" she answered nervously.

The Nazi looked down at his sheet to write her name down and realized that she was family with Natalia.

"Age?"

"_Twenty years old_"

"Birth date?"

"_October 4, 1921_"

"Right!" he shouted again.

Izabela felt lighter as she ran in Natalia's arms. She got really lucky but she knew it. She looked around and saw children tore apart from their mother.

_**In the barracks…**_

The barrack was incredibly humid and smelled like rotten eggs, which gave Natalia the need to throw up. She didn't because somebody pulled at the hem of her dress at the same moment. She looked down and saw a little boy crying. She bent down to see his face.

"_Hey you_" she said softly, wiping away the boy's tears. "_Where's your mommy_?"

Izabela looked down at her sister. She always thought Natalia would do a great mother one day. Just because she was so good with children and that she loved them so much.

"_My mommy was very sick so the mean men in green took her away. She said that she was going to the hospital but she didn't come back_."

"_Do you know where your family is_?"

The little boy shook his head.

"_Maybe you'd like to stay with me and my sister until we find your family_?" Natalia asked.

He nodded and took a long look at Natalia as she was smiling softly at him, her heart broken.

"_You're really pretty_" he finally said.

"_Thank you_" she giggled. "_You're pretty handsome yourself_"

He giggled, blushing.

"_What's your name, sweetie_?"

"_Teodor_" he replied shyly.

"_That's a beautiful name you got here. Mine's Natalia_"

"_I think you have a beautiful name too_"

"_I want you to meet my sister, she's going to stay with us_" she said, taking him in her arms. "_Teodor, this is Izabela_"

"_Hi Teodor, it's nice to meet you_" Izabela said, shaking his little hand.

He didn't look at Izabela because he was too shy to talk to her yet but he turned to Natalia.

"_Your sister is pretty too_"


	16. Chapter 16

_**A month later… **_

"Come on, Zachary, it's now or never" Scott repeated for the 10th time.

"I have to wait until he's alone, idiot. I'm not gonna do it when his buddies are there to take care of me afterwards" Zachary explained, slightly annoyed.

"Well how long are we supposed to wait?" he sighed.

"I stalked him for a couple of days and he always cross this alley to go home after his shift. That's gonna be the perfect moment because he's gonna be all alone."

"Great. I'm behind you, let's go."

They both walked behind the trash can and hid. Zachary looked at Scott.

"Shut up" he said before he could talk.

Scott nodded innocently.

"I mean it, dude, not a word"

He zipped his lips and kept quiet. Zachary heard footsteps coming towards the alley and both Zachary and Scott held up their rift. They shot in the German's back and he fell on the ground. Zachary shot him again to be sure he was really dead then walked to him. He took the soldier's uniform off then put it on as Scott was looking around. They left the alley as if nothing happened.

"Good luck, man. I really hope you'll find her. If something ever happened… It was nice knowing you."

Zachary man hugged his friend and thanked him for what he did then walked away. His plan was perfect. He would jump on the next train that was going to Auschwitz even though he didn't know if Natalia was there. He was scared. He didn't know what to expect. He knew, though, that it was for a good cause. He would have Natalia back.

_**The next day…**_

As a few Nazis were filling the train with cruelty, Zachary watched from the back line, horrified. He tried to spot someone he knew but he didn't. Maybe she was already there. He had heard that the whole ghetto would be transferred to Auschwitz so she really was there.

After everyone was packed inside and the doors were closed the soldiers got into the first wagon, all comfortable in their seats. Zachary could hear the screams of people calling and pleading for help. It brought tears to his eyes. The other soldiers were acting as if everything was normal and that they weren't hearing anything. They were talking and laughing like normal people would do on a coffee break.

_**A day and a half later… **_

The train stopped and Zachary was on duty to open the doors and send the prisoners to the right place. He opened the first door and he almost threw up when a man's dead body fell at his feet. He helped, subtly, the people to get to the ground and told them to get into a row on the platform. When he opened the second door, the smell that came to his nose was so strong that he jumped back. People hurried out of the wagon as others were lying there on the floor, their opened eyes still pleading for help. Zachary couldn't move for a few seconds, it was too horrible.

_**Meanwhile… **_

Natalia, along with all the other women from her barrack, was done with her task at 5:00pm. The bell rang, letting them know it was time to go to the main room for their daily bread portion. After that would be the selection, like every other Thursdays. Selections were the time of the week when the SS decided who would go through another week and who wouldn't. After they had chosen, they would alternate through the options on how eliminate the selected ones. In front of everybody else.

Teodor was walking slowly beside Natalia, holding her hand. He was sick with the typhus since a week or two and he was becoming weaker every day.

They stood in line, waiting, hoping that it would have something left when their turn would come. They sat in their usual spot and Natalia drank her glass of water in long gulp then gave her bread slice to Teodor.

"_Here you go, Teo_"

Izabela looked at her sister then at the little boy that she now considered like her little brother.

"_You have to eat Natalia, you didn't eat your portion in three days_."

Teodor looked at both the girls, not knowing if it was ok to take the bread or not.

"_One day or two, what does it change anyway? It doesn't even matter anymore. Take it_" she instructed to the little boy. "_I want you to have it and gain some strength. You need it more than I do_"

"_Thank you_" he said, eating the slice of bread.

"_Can I have a big hug_?" she asked.

He nodded and wrapped his little arms around Natalia's thin body, burying his face in her stomach.

"_I love you_" he muttered.

Her eyes filled with tears and she kissed Teodor's head.

"_I love you too_" she whispered.

Izabela smiled warmly at Natalia with watering eyes. Her little sister was truly amazing. She had such a big heart. She had nothing but she was still able to give to the ones she cared about.

_**A little later…**_

They were all standing in their usual row, waiting for the terrible moment, hoping their names wouldn't be called. The Nazis were calling the names of those who didn't work hard enough in the week to stay along with those who were too sick to fulfill their tasks. The moment she heard Teodor's name being called, Natalia's heart shattered in millions of pieces. Teodor took a step forward just like the others selected did. He was too young and didn't quite understand what was going on. Izabela discreetly took Natalia's hand. If she ever cried, they would see it as a sign of weakness and would call her name too. When all the names were called, they followed the selected ones and stopped in front of a block. Teodor followed the people inside and turned around one last time to wave at Natalia and Izabela, his big sisters. He asked the soldier standing next to him where they were going and he told him that they would be in for a quick shower then go to sleep. The only thing he forgot to mention was that his sleep would be eternal. Natalia closed her eyes when she heard the noise of the old plumbing but a soldier yelled at her to keep her eyes open.

"You! All of you!" he yelled at everybody in German. "Look at your friends and family, they're escaping by the chimney"

He then laughed like evil. Natalia looked down at her feet, holding back her tears.

"Look up!" the soldier yelled again.

He pointed his gun to her head when she didn't.

"Look at it if you don't want to join them"

She nodded, terrified, and looked up as the Nazi put away his gun.

_**In the barrack… **_

Natalia burst into tears along with many other people that lost someone important tonight. Izabela hugged her and they cried together.

"_We're going to survive this, Bella. We're gonna get out of here alive. Nothing scares us, right_?"

"_You bet we are_"

She took her hand, still hugging her.

"_We're invincible_."

"_I love you_"

"_I love you too_"


	17. Chapter 17

_**The next day… **_

As she was working, she felt a hand on her arm. It was Friday afternoon, she didn't have to turn around to know who it was. That meant she was off duty for an hour and she could meet him in their hiding spot, on the other side of the camp ground.

"_Josef_?" she whispered as she walked inside the cabin.

"_Hey_" he said with a smile.

He walked to her and picked her up before kissing her softly.

"_And this is for you, miss_" he added as he gave her a cookie.

"_It's delicious_" she admitted, taking a bite. "_I was hungry, thank you_"

She finished the cookie and kissed him again.

"_I love you so much_" he said, his face buried in her neck.

"_Yeah? Me too_"

They stayed like that for a while. Josef looked at her and rolled his eyes to the back room. Natalia giggled, kissed his lips and nodded. Josef walked to the room as Natalia was kissing his neck. He closed the door and rested Natalia's back on the door.

"_Josef, I'm gross_" she whispered against his face. "_I mean I gross myself out_"

"_I think you're beautiful_"

"_I – I don't want you to see me like this_"

"_What's the matter_?" Josef asked, stopping everything.

"_Listen, I'd really love to do it, believe me. I missed you so much that I'd give everything to spend a single minute with you_"

"_Natalia, just shut up and listen, will you_?"

She looked at him.

"_I love you. No matter how you look. What I love is you, inside. You're amazing. Of course, you're pretty and everything, eh_?" he said with a smile.

Natalia blushed and looked down.

"_Hey_?"

"_What?_" she asked softly, looking up at him.

"_I love you_" he mouthed.

She smiled and kissed him deeply. He picked her up and lied her down on the little bed. He ran his hands softly on Natalia's body, hearing her sigh. He loved her. So much. It was so powerful, he would die for her. In a heartbeat. Natalia felt loved and that's all she was asking for. Josef's lips joined hers and their tongues got in a middle of a battle in her mouth. She unbuttoned his shirt then his pants. After a few minutes, they were under the sheets, trying to be as quiet as possible. Natalia's face was buried in Josef's shoulder, muffling her moans. If they were caught together like this, they would both be killed. She felt her climax coming and she held on Josef's hand tighter. He held on to her hand, trying to reassure her that everything was fine. He kissed her as she climaxed, the sound of her moans stifling in his throat.

_**Ten minutes later… **_

They were cuddling, enjoying the fifteen minutes they had left together.

"_Next Friday, you'll be out of here, I'll get you out of here_" Josef announced, looking deeply in her eyes and stroking her tangled hair.

"_I can't leave my sister here, Josef_" she replied as she cuddled up closer.

"_I know, that's why she's leaving with you_…"

"_You can get us both out of here_?" she asked.

"_Would you accept this_?" he added, picking a box out of his coat pocket on the ground.

He opened it and a diamond ring was inside. Natalia took the box in her hand, a huge smile on her face. She stared at it for a long time in silence, smiling big.

"_So_?" he asked after a moment, still stroking Natalia's hair.

She looked up at him and nodded with tears in her eyes. He smiled and kissed her before he put the ring on her finger. It was fitting perfectly. She looked down at it, smiling, then looked up at him again.

"_I can't keep it, they're gonna take it away_"

"_I'm going to keep it for now, I'll give it back to you when you're gonna leave_"

"_I should go before they suspect anything_"

She picked up her clothes and kissed her fiancé before leaving out the window. She walked away and saw a man that seemed familiar. He was wearing a Nazi uniform so she brushed the thought away. She felt the man stare at her from a distance and her heart beat faster. She walked closer, hoping she wasn't in trouble.

"Zachary?" she asked, her jaw dropping.

He looked at her in silence.

"You're here" he finally murmured.

She looked at him from head to toes a couple of times, disgusted by what he was wearing.

"Why are you wearing this? You're on their side now?"

"What? No, it's not what you think. I – I stole this uniform to see you and get you out of here"

She looked back at the cabin, hoping that Josef wouldn't leave by the front door. Zachary kept smiling like an idiot, looking at her. Natalia was messed up. She never forgot Zachary but she learned to live without him. She had been through so much in the last two years and a half that she rebuilt her life around what was her new life, as cruel as it was.

"You're too later, I already leave on Friday" she explained.

"What are you talking about?" he questioned, his smile fading.

"I'm in love with somebody else, Zachary" she declared, crying softly.

His heart flunked in his chest.

"I came to get you… I thought you wanted to live with me" he said, working hard to hold back his tears.

"I am engaged"

"You promised that you would wait for me"

"I waited. I waited for two years. You promised me that you would take me back with you" she declared, heartbroken. "Maybe you kept me waiting too long"

Tears escaped his eyes when he saw the pain in hers. He never looked away and neither did she. Their eyes were locked even though the tears were blurring his vision.

"I love you, Natalia" he murmured, crying.

"I love you too, Zachary, but I'm not in love with you anymore" she admitted, trying to wipe the tears away with the back of her shaky hand. "I have to go, I'm not supposed to be here" she said as she walked back to the barracks.

"So that's it?" he exclaimed as she walked away. "You're gonna leave me behind as if nothing ever happened between us?"

She kept walking, not bothering to wipe her tears away anymore. She didn't want to turn around because she knew that seeing his face would make it harder. She felt so guilty, so mean. Zachary ran to her and took her arm. Natalia turned around and looked up at him, her face covered in tears. He held back the urge to kiss her passionately, like he did before.

"I know I took a long time to come back, I don't blame you for being mad at me about that" he whispered. "But I was also engaged as a soldier to go on the battlefield. I signed a contract with the army before I came to Poland! You know, every day, on the battlefield or not, you were the only thing I wanted. I wanted to be with you, kiss you, hold you and relive that night again and again."

The tears were falling freely from her eyes.

"You have no idea of what I've been through and believe me when I tell you that I wanted to get you out of here as soon as I could. I know you've been through horrible things too and I would do anything to go back before all of this happened. And I'm crazy about you. I'm thinking about you, day and night, since the day I've met you and you think you can just throw me away like that? That you can break my heart like that? How heartless can you be?"

"I'm sorry" she sobbed loudly. "I wish I could tell you the same thing, I really do"

"Next Sunday I'll wait for you at this place" he said as he gave her a piece of paper with an address written on it. "If you don't come, I'll get the message and leave you alone. You're gonna be able to marry anyone you want. But if you realize I'm the guy for you, like you must've told me a thousand times back then, then meet me there and next thing you know, you're gonna be on a boat to America"

Natalia looked down at the paper, crying.

"I'll wait for you" he ended, leaving her alone.

She looked up and realized he was gone. She looked around but didn't see him anywhere. She walked back to where she was supposed to be and went back to work, trying to ignore her feelings. The feelings she had for Josef but also the confusion of what she was feeling toward Zachary. She wanted to marry Josef otherwise she wouldn't have said yes when he proposed to her. But Zachary appeared and took the right to mess everything up.

_**That night…**_

She was lying down with her sister, cuddled up to her. They always did so to keep a certain warmth.

"_Josef asked me to marry him today_" she whispered in Izabela's ear.

Izabela was shocked. She still didn't approve of their relationship, of course, but she wouldn't destroy her sister's only source of happiness.

"_What did you say_?"

"_Well, yes of course. You should've seen the ring he gave me, it was beautiful_"

"_Don't let him buy you with pretty things_"

"_He doesn't have to_" Natalia frowned. "_I love him. You don't know him, you can't judge. He's a perfect gentleman, he's not what you think he is_"

"_They're all alike. Children of evil_"

"_Josef is not like that, you're just too proud to admit it. I won't let you influence me. Anyway, next Friday, he'll get us both out of here. We're gonna run away, get married and live in Paris together. Of course, you can come along_."

Izabela rolled her eyes.

"_Gee, thanks, 'cause that makes me feel so much better. And that's the most stupid thing I've ever heard. Plus, you don't even speak French_."

"_So? I can learn it. You should be thankful, he's gonna save your ass_"

"_Fine, I guess you're right. But I still think this whole Paris thing is stupid_"

"_Once you know him, you're gonna love him. He's perfect_" she said dreamily.


	18. Chapter 18

_**Friday night…**_

It was around midnight when Natalia saw Josef's hand motion to them that they could come out. They hurried out of the barrack quietly. Josef was with one of his best friend that was on the same side as his. Natalia had never met him before but he was nice. He looked around to be sure no one was coming and the two guys led them to the fence. They had hid a hole they had shoved into the ground. The girls would escape from there. Izabela walked a few steps back with Josef's friend to let the two lovebirds a few minutes together.

"_I'll meet you there in three days, I'm leaving tomorrow night_" Josef said, giving Natalia a key. "_A friend of mine is waiting for you with his car, about a mile from here. He's gonna bring you both to the hotel room in Warsaw. There's going to be some clothes waiting for you there_" he explained. "_And be careful, will you_?"

"_We will_" Natalia said, nodding.

Josef slid the ring on her finger and kissed her.

"_I love you_" he whispered, stroking her hair. "_I can't wait to see those amazing brown eyes again_"

"_I love you, Josef. Forever_" Natalia added before kissing him with love.

"_Time to go, huh_?" he whispered as he pulled away, not wanting to let her go. "_Be quiet and run if you hear a noise of any kind. Don't you turn around_" he indicated to the girls. "_Don't you ever turn around. I'll see you soon_"

Natalia and Izabela crossed the fence in silence and Natalia turned around one last time to look at Josef. She felt happy and free. Josef waved at her with sad eyes. As if it was the last time he would ever see her. She just wanted to cry. Or jump in his arms and kiss him until she couldn't breathe anymore. He nodded, reassuring her that everything would be fine, and forces a smile. Natalia realized something was wrong. She didn't know what but she could feel it.

"_Come on, Natalia, we have to go_" Izabela whispered, taking her sister's arm.

They heard something suspicious and started running. They separated their path to be sure they couldn't be spotted that easily. Fireguns started to shoot. It was burning inside, she had to turn around. She looked behind her, wanting to know if she was the subject of the shots. She saw Izabela fall on the ground, a bullet in her head, a few feet away from her. She panicked and threw herself on the ground as soon as she heard a new batch of bullets being shot.

_**Two hours later… **_

Natalia looked around to be sure she was safe and got up when she saw that no one was there. Her body was sore and tired. She saw Izabela on the ground, in a pool of blood. She closed her eyes and felt a tear burning her cheek.

"_I'm sorry_" she whispered in tears.

How they always said they would come out of there alive, together. Because they were one in the same. Izabela had always completed her. She was serious, her feet to the ground. Natalia was crazy and always in trouble. They were completing each other.

She turned around and she saw, on the other side of the fence, two slaughtered bodies. Her heart stopped beating. It took a few seconds before she realized that Josef, her Josef, was one of those men. She burst into tears, her heart broke like shattered glass. She stood there, crying hysterically, holding back the screams that wanted desperately to escape her throat. She looked at the horrid scene in front of her eyes and ran to her freedom even though her legs were weak in the knees. Her whole body was shaking. She slowly stopped her running to a walk and finally met up with a guy that was waiting, leaned against his pick-up truck.

"_Are you Natalia_?" he asked.

She nodded. She didn't have to strength to talk.

"_Josef told me you would be two. Where's your friend_?"

"_She decided not to come_" she stuttered.

"_Oh… Alright… Well, let's go_!"

They both got into the truck. The trip was quiet. Dead silence. Dead. That's how Natalia felt.

They drove for a whole day and when Natalia recognized her hometown, she turned to Josef's friend.

"_Do you think you could drop me at this address, please? There's something I need to do_" she asked, showing him a piece of paper.

"_Hum, yeah, sure_" he replied, confused.

He dropped her off and left after she had thanked him. Natalia looked at him drive away and felt a new batch of tears leaving her puffy eyes. She stared at the ring attached to her finger. She felt nothing but pain and sorrow. She had escaped the physical pain by running away but her heart ached so much that she would've rather died. With Izabela. And Josef. At the thought of him, her heart bled. Her throat was filled with sobs and she felt sick. She sat on the sidewalk and threw up in the sewer.

She sat there for a long time, trying to calm her nervous stomach but ended up throwing up for a second time. People were starting to leave their house to go to work and some of them looked at her from the corner of their eyes. Her dress was ruined, covered with sand and ripped, her hair were a mess, she looked like a skeleton and she was awfully pale. She could still taste the acid taste of her vomit and her stomach wasn't full proof yet. She got up and walked slowly to the apartment block and knocked on the door number seven.

Zachary opened the door, sleepy, and squint his eyes at the bright light. They looked at each other for a while in silence, not knowing what to say and who should talk first. Zachary stared at her red and puffy face and stepped to the side.

"Come in" he invited.

She walked in and realized that the apartment was empty except for a chair and a few sheets on the floor where he seemed to sleep. The awkward silence was still there. Zachary didn't know what to say first. He didn't want to say things she didn't want to hear and he didn't want to ask questions that he didn't want to know the answers to. Maybe she was just there to tell him that she didn't want to see him again and that she chose to live without him.

"I'm sorry, I'm late" she spoke first. "I needed a moment alone" she said as she ran her hand through her hair.

He nodded and spotted the ring on her finger. His heart dropped at the bottom of his chest and he swallowed hard. He decided that ignoring the subject would be better for now.

"I – I bought you a new dress" he began, looking away. "And there's everything in the bathroom if you want to take a bath" he added with a shrug.

"Alright" she muttered, looking around.

He leaded her to the bathroom and showed her where everything was. He hung the dress behind the door and left her alone, closing the door. He waited for about thirty minutes, sitting on the chair. The little box in his pocket seemed to burn his thigh and his eyes were tearing up a little more every time he imagined Natalia with another man.

Natalia walked out of the bathroom, wearing her new dress, her wet hair falling on her shoulders. She ran her hand in her hair and Zachary saw that the ring wasn't there anymore.

"Are you hungry?" he asked. "We could go and grab a bite or something…"

She nodded. She had barely uttered a word since she got there. Zachary smiled.

"Great. There's a little café on the corner. Let me just go to the bathroom first."

In the bathroom, he spotted the ring on the sink. She probably forgot to take it back after she had put on her dress. He looked at it and finally took it in his hands. The ring was pure gold and four diamonds of four karats were on it. Inside the ring were engraved the letters J&N followed by 'Kocham Cie', which meant, he knew, 'I love you' in Polish. The ring he had in his pocket didn't worth anything compared to this one.

He walked back to the living room and coughed to have Natalia's attention.

" Yo – You forgot this on the sink…" he stuttered, giving her back the ring.

"Thank you" she murmured, forcing a smile to ease the awkwardness as she put it back on her finger.

_**At the café… **_

The café was empty except for an old man sitting at the counter, reading the newspaper, and a young waitress. The awkward silence was still there but Zachary couldn't take it anymore. After they had ordered, he talked, someone had to.

"What's his name?" he finally asked.

"Josef" she answered after eternal minutes of silence.

She looked up at him, tearing up at the simple pronunciation of his name. Zachary kept a minute of silence, knowing she needed it.

"How long have you been dating?" he questioned, nodding to the ring.

"A year and three months" she replied, staring at her thighs.

Zachary saw the tear falling from the corner of Natalia's eye. He sighed softly and stood up to sit with her on her side of the table. He brought her closer to him. Natalia burst into tears in his chest. The waitress looked at them, wondering what was going on. Zachary motioned that everything was under control. He held Natalia closer and kissed her head when he felt her shaking against him. He stroked her hair and rubbed her back, trying to calm her down from her huge sobs.

"Shhh" he whispered, still holding her.

"He's dead" she sobbed. "He's dead" she repeated, bursting into tears again.

She tried to convince herself. She had lost everything. Everybody. And two of them only because she escaped. It was her fault. She saw the look Josef gave her from the other side of the fence just before she ran away. He knew. He knew he would die because he had helped Jews to run away but most of all because he fell in love with someone he shouldn't have. She saw, again and again, his eyes telling her that everything would be fine and that she had to choose freedom. But freedom came with a price. The life of the man she loved. Right now, in Zachary's arms, she felt, for the first time, her freedom. She remembered the past. How much she had loved that boy. How much he changed her life. How much he would have gave his life for her too. He was the only thing she had left. Zachary.

He pulled away when he saw the waitress coming with their plated. He sat back on his side of the table and looked at Natalia eat.

She ate two sandwiches and drank two huge glasses of milk.

"_Can I bring you some coffee and dessert_?" the waitress asked as she picked up their empty plates.

"_I'm gonna take a coffee, please_" Zachary responded.

"_What are the desserts_?" Natalia asked.

"_I've got two specials on the menu today. Chocolate cookies or cheesecake_"

The cookies made her thought of Josef.

"_Cheesecake, please_" she ordered with a forced smile.

"_A coffee with that_?"

"_No, thank you. Can I get a glass of milk_?" she asked, blushing slightly.

"_Sure_" the waitress said with a smile then left with the dirty dishes.

"You're a real little veal, today" Zachary pointed out with a chuckle.

"I didn't drink milk in ages" she giggled.

"It's great to hear you laugh" he said, smiling.

They stayed at the café for most of the morning and talked about a lot of things.

"Would you like to go to America? There's a ship leaving in two days…"

"I don't know" Natalia hesitated. "Would it be right? I mean, after what happened."

"Well, we're friends, aren't we?" he shrugged. "And my mother assured me that you could live with her at my house. If you'd prefer to live on your own, it can be arranged too"

Natalia didn't want to disturb anybody. Much less someone she didn't know. She finally accepted even though she was nervous about living in a country she didn't know, in a house she didn't know with someone she didn't know. Plus, she wasn't exactly perfectly comfortable with the English language.

"I thought you could live with her for a while, just to, you know, get adapted to the country. And after, if you want to live by yourself, I will cover all the expenses"

"No, thank you" she riposted. "I can take care of myself, Zachary. I'll find a job and pay for my own expenses"

"The ship leaves on Tuesday morning" he explained. "You're going to stay in the apartment we were in earlier until then. I'll get you some food and clothes"

"Is it long to cross the Atlantic Ocean to get to America?"

"A few days… But you're going to be fine"

"Thank you, Zachary. For everything you did – do for me" she corrected herself.

Zachary smiled at her and got up to pay the addition. They left the cage and after he walked her up to the apartment, he left, assuring her that he would come back the next morning.


	19. Chapter 19

_**That night…**_

Natalia practically didn't get any sleep that night, afraid by the darkness and the fact that she was alone. She kept having flashbacks. She also thought of her day. After everything that happened, Zachary had forgiven her and had accepted to stay friends with her. He was a great friend too. He understood everything that was going on in her head and her broken heart.

She suddenly heard a crack and turned around to look at the door, her heart beating fast. Did they find her? How? Did Josef's friend sell her out? She got up and took the chair that was in the corner of the room. She walked to the door and after she was sure it was locked, she put the chair under the doorknob. She ran back to her improvised bed nervously. Floor or not, she was used to sleep on something else than a mattress. She closed her eyes, uncertain, but didn't fall asleep.

_**The next morning…**_

Zachary knocked softly on the door. Natalia let out a little scream and hid under the sheets.

"Natalia? It's Zachary. Can you let me in?" he asked from the other side of the door.

She ran to the door and put the chair away. She cracked the door open to be sure it was him then opened it completely. She felt a little dizzy and grasped the door frame. Zachary held her.

"Hey, you ok?" he asked, concerned.

"Yeah" she reassured him, smiling softly. "Just got a little dizzy, that's all. I'm fine now."

"I brought some bread and strawberry jam, you hungry?"

"I'm starving."

They sat in the middle of the living room and ate their breakfast.

"How was your sleep?"

"Not great" she admitted.

"Sorry, I know the floor isn't comfortable"

"The floor was just fine" she said, dead serious. "It's just that – I heard suspicious noises and that kept me awake all night long"

"Suspicious?"

"That was nothing, I was nervous. I just thought they found me, you know, the Germans. I don't want to go back there, much less alone"

"You want me to spend the night?"

"No, that's ok, thank you. You already did enough. I'm a grown woman, I can stay alone for one more night"

_**The next day…**_

"Ready to go?" Zachary asked as soon as Natalia opened the door.

"Yeah" she replied with a smile, taking her suitcase filled with clothes that Zachary had bought for her the previous day.

"My friend's waiting downstairs, I want you to meet him, he's awesome" he added, taking Natalia's suitcase.

"Okay" she smiled. "I – I can take care of that, Zachary" she assured him, taking about the suitcase.

"I know, but I want to do it"

They walked downstairs and got out of the block apartment. Scott smiled when he saw them come out.

"There she is!"

Natalia smiled slightly and Zachary put her suitcase in the trunk of the car.

"We were never properly introduced, I think. I'm Scott" he introduced himself, holding out his hand.

"I'm Natalia" she replied, shaking his hand.

"I've heard so much about you, you have no idea. I'm sure I already know half of your life."

Natalia blushed and bit her lip to hold back a smile.

"Shut up, man!" Zachary exclaimed. "He's lying" he added, turning to Natalia. "First thing to know about Scott it that he's talking too much, most of the time for nothing important"

"Hey!" Scott riposted.

Natalia giggled.

"Well, at least it makes her laugh" Zachary pointed out.

"Seriously" Scott said to her. "He's always talking about you"

Zachary glared at him and Scott lifted up his hands in defeat. Natalia was laughing at the two guys.

"Well I think it's charming" she said to Zachary to make him feel better.

"It's embarrassing" he chuckled, as red as a tomato.

"See? She liked it"

Zachary rolled his eyes, making Natalia laugh even more.

"Alright, let's go"

_**At the port… **_

Scott took Natalia's suitcase out of the trunk.

"Here you go, miss"

"Thanks Scott, that's very sweet" she said, taking her suitcase. "We'll see each other again, right?" she asked with a wink. "You're gonna have to tell me everything he told you about me!"

"Alright, alright, stop mocking me" Zac exclaimed as Natalia giggled.

"I'll be sure to go to New Orleans as soon as I get back to the States. We have so much to talk about!"

He looked at Zachary that seemed impatient so he stopped laughing.

"Alright, hum, so I guess I'll see you soon?"

He hugged Natalia quickly and shot her a smile followed by a wink.

"Take care"

"I will" she reassured him. "You too"

She already liked him, he was so funny. She knew he would be a great friend.

"Of course" he nodded.

He smiled at her one last time and walked back to the car, leaving them behind him.

"He's funny" Natalia admitted, turning to Zachary.

"Depends for who" he chuckled. "Alright, so, my mother's going to pick you up and bring you home as soon as the ship's going to dock. She already found you an apartment not far from the house but she really wants you to spend a few days with her first. She doesn't want you to be alone on your first days in America" he explained nervously.

"Alright" she nodded. "You can calm down now, I'm the one that should be nervous"

Zachary chuckled. He looked at her for a long time, not knowing what to do next. He leaned in to kiss her cheeks but Natalia pecked his lips instead. He couldn't move but kept looking at her, shocked, and then he smiled slightly. They heard a horn, meaning the boat was leaving in 15 minutes. Natalia looked at the ship then back at Zachary.

"You should go"

"When are you coming back?" she asked.

"In two months, just before Christmas"

"Alright" she smiled. "I'll be waiting for you" she added as she ran her hand on his cheek.

Zachary felt the ring against his skin and lost his smile without her noticing.

"You better go if you don't want the ship to leave without you"

He hugged her tight and kissed her forehead. Natalia walked on the footbridge and turned around just before entering the ship. She waved at Zachary with a smile and he waved back, his eyes burning until she disappeared inside. She was beautiful. She was perfect. He lost her. He used to have her, for himself, but he let her go. A man, luckier than him, had won her heart and had given her a ring. Zachary wondered what would have happened if he had given her the ring before she was taken away in that ghetto. This 'Josef' had stolen his girlfriend and he asked her to marry him. She said yes because she obviously loved him back. Zachary didn't know if what she had with Josef was as strong as what he had with her. Did they share a night like the one they did in the tree house? Did he have a chance to touch her soft skin after him? He wanted to convince himself that he was jealous of that but what he really was jealous about was that Josef had succeed at keeping her happy through all this nightmare and not him.

_**Back at the military base…**_

Zachary went to the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He stared at his reflection for a while and took a box out of his pocket. He opened it and looked at the ring that was inside. He finally took it and flushed it down the toilet. He bit his lip, trying hard not to cry, then yelled and slammed his fist into the wall.

_**Meanwhile… **_

Natalia finally found her cabin and set her suitcase down, smiling dreamily at the bed that would be her own for a few days. A bed… She snapped out of it when she heard the door open. She turned around and saw a girl that seemed to be around the same age as her sister.

"_Hi_" she greeted.

"_Hi_" she replied with a smile. "_I'm Marianna_" she introduced herself.

"_I'm Natalia. Hum, is it okay if I took this bed? You can have it if you want, I'll just take the other one, it doesn't matter_"

"_I'd rather have top bunk, it's way more fun_" she admitted, chuckling. "_You can keep this one_"

The ship left the port a few minutes later and Natalia had to lie down.

"_Are you alright_?" Marianna asked with concern.

"_I don't feel so good, maybe it's gonna go away if I lie down for a while_"

"_Poor you, you must be seasick. It's awful_"

Natalia ended up spending the four days of the crossing resting in bed. She got up to go to the bathroom and throw up then she was going back to bed. She surely wouldn't even think of getting on a boat ever again.


	20. Chapter 20

**October 1942, New Orleans, USA**

Natalia was the third person to leave the ship. She couldn't wait to get out of there. A crowd of people were waiting outside. Natalia realized she didn't know what Zachary's mother looked like. She looked around and saw a woman holding a sign with her name on it. She smiled softly and walked to her. She looked exactly like Zachary or Zachary looked like her.

"Hello Mrs Stephens, I'm Natalia" she introduced herself.

"Of course you are, look at you!" she said, hugging her. "I'm Emily, Zachary's mom" she added, pulling away.

"It's nice to meet you" she replied with a smile.

"The pleasure's all mine. Come on, let's go home"

_**At the Stephens's' home…**_

They entered the house and Natalia looked around in wonder. It wasn't that big, it's just that it seemed so long since she was in an actual house. It seemed huge but she knew it wasn't really. It was just a regular house, like the one she used to have with her family before the war. She put down her suitcase by the staircase and took off her shoes.

"The living room is to your right, the kitchen right this way. Make yourself at home" Emily told her, seeing she was incredibly shy.

Natalia smiled softly at her and walked around the house. There were a lot of pictures of Zachary everywhere. He was his mother's pride and joy. It made her smile. She opened a door and realized it was Zachary's room. She looked from the outside, it didn't feel right to go in. There was a blue cover on the bed and there were some frames on his desk. One with his mother on his graduation day and another one where he was wearing a baseball uniform with a man that was probably his father. Natalia didn't have nothing of this left. She would never see family photos again. She wouldn't graduate high school either. She was 20 years old and her life had been destroyed already. She didn't have any family left and her fiancé had been shot after giving her freedom. She had left her country and the only thing she had left in her life was Zachary and his amazing mother. He had been so nice to her, too much. She broke his heart. She didn't deserve his help, much less his friendship. She closed the door and walked back to the kitchen where Emily was. She was still shy. She didn't know her and she felt bad to invade her house and her life like that.

"Can I help you with something?" the young woman asked shyly when she saw Emily chopping some vegetables.

"No, thank you, sweetie. You can go and rest, I'll call you when dinner's ready" she replied with a smile.

Natalia nodded but stood there.

"Oh!" the older woman exclaimed, realizing she forgot to say something. "Your room's the first door to the left, upstairs"

"Thank you"

Emily stared at her, making her uncomfortable.

"Zachary wasn't kidding when he said you were beyond beautiful" she finally said.

"He… He said that?" she stuttered as she blushed.

"At least a thousand times" she smiled.

Natalia smiled.

"I'm just – I"

Natalia pointed upstairs, not sure how to say it.

"Oh! Of course! Go on"

_**Upstairs… **_

Natalia walked into the guest room and looked around. Flowers had been set on a little table in the corner of the room. She walked closer and saw en envelope with her name on it. She looked around as if the responsible was in the room with her, hiding somewhere. She took the envelope and opened it.

"Dear Natalia, if you read this it's because you're safely arrived in New Orleans, in the house where I grew up. I hope you're gonna have a great bond with my mother, she can be capricious sometimes. Actually, she bought these flowers for you and I made her promise to give you this letter that I sent home. But I didn't write this to talk about my mother.

I know about the secret relationship you had with Josef. Two completely different people but still in love. While soldiers killed innocent people like you, he wouldn't have let a fly hurt you. He loved you…"

Tears were streaming down Natalia's cheeks but she didn't have the strength to wipe them away. She had no idea how Zachary knew Josef was a German soldier.

"He told me. Yeah, I talked to him. After you left, that afternoon, at the camp. He came to me and asked me if you did anything wrong. At first, I didn't quite understand. I couldn't tell anything about what happened between us and he couldn't either. But he finally told me everything. We spent the night talking. About you. He told me about how you were gonna run away with your sister. He knew, Natalia, he always knew. He knew that if he kept you close, it would be selfish because what you were living through was beyond terrible. He also knew, though, that if he let you go, it would come with a price. One way or another, the couple wouldn't have made it. When love is too strong, it kills. And Josef decided that he would be the one to sacrifice his life for you and not the other way around. His love for you was so intense that it killed him.

I'll never say bad things about him because he saved your life and I also know what he felt at that instant. Losing the person you love is so painful. But you probably already know that. That's why I want you to keep this ring forever. To remind you how much this man loved you and how he gave his own life to save yours. I was madly in love with you, Natalia, but sometimes, it's better to let go of the people you love for them to be happy, even if it hurts. I just want you to know that I'm always gonna be there for you. I'll be the best friend you never had. To end this letter, the next page is the message I have to deliver for him. He wrote it himself.

Zachary xxx"

She read Zachary's letter twice and finally turned the page to see Josef's handwriting. Her eyes filled with tears again and her throat blocked. She sat on the bed, not knowing if she could take it. She first smelled the sheet of paper, trying to find the smell of the man she loved but there was nothing. The letter was written in Polish. Josef knew that she didn't understand anything to German.

"_Natalia, my love,_

_I have so much to say that I don't know where to begin. First of all, I want you to forgive me. I didn't want to see you suffer anymore. I wanted your life to be what it was supposed to be. Be like you; extraordinary. You showed me how to love. To love somebody for who they are and nothing else. I was lucky, though, 'cause you were pretty on both inside and outside. I'm going to miss you, princess. Your brown eyes and how they looked at me with so much innocence. Your brown locks falling on your shoulders. Your perfect lips on mine when you were kissing me softly. Your head that was fitting perfectly on my shoulder and the sound of your voice when you were saying that you loved me. I love you too, Natalia, and I always will. Love isn't always easy though and sometimes we have to make sacrifices. I want you to meet the man of your life, the one that's gonna make you laugh and cry in the same day, that's gonna tell you that he loves you every day. The one that's gonna want to fall asleep with you in his arms every night and wake up the next morning with you still there. I know it's hard to believe right now but you'll see, he's going to come, and he may be closer than you think. I helped you to run away so you could be free and I will find my freedom the day I'll be sure your life will be everything you wanted it to be. Because that's what you deserve. I'll be the dove you'll set free on your wedding day. I love you Natalia._

_Josef xxx_"

Natalia was choking on her tears. She felt like that night, the night she ran away and turned around to see that Josef was lying on the ground, dead. She went to the window and stared at the blue sky, thinking about everything and everybody she had lost. She wiped her tears, not wanting Zachary's mother to hear her. The feeling in her heart made her realize that all these years weren't that bad compared to the last couple of weeks. She closed her eyes and saw the last time she saw Josef. 'I love you, he had whispered, I can't wait to see those amazing brown eyes again'. She thought about the last time their skin touched. How he showed her he loved her.

_**One hour later…**_

"Natalia, sweetie, dinner's ready" Emily called from down the stairs.

"I'll be down in a minute, Mrs Stephens" Natalia replied.

She hid any trace of tears and smiled as she walked down the stairs. They sat at the table and ate.

"Did Zachary tell you that I found a little apartment for you?" Emily asked. "He told me you wanted to live on your own. "

"Yeah, he told me. That's really nice of you, you didn't have to do that for me. "

"It's nothing, really. It's not really far from here, about fifteen minutes by walk. But just know that you're always welcome here. "

"Thank you. Thank you so much…"


	21. Chapter 21

_**A few days later… **_

Natalia walked into a fruit & vegetable market and saw a man by the counter.

"Hello, my name's Natalia. I'm here to see Mr Wilson?"

"Oh yes! I almost forgot you were coming. I'm Arthur Wilson" he said, holding out his hand.

"Natalia Kovalska" she replied, shaking his hand.

"Perfect. So we'll go in my office and talk about a couple of things, is it okay with you?"

"No problem"

_**In Mr Wilson's office…**_

"I noticed an accent" Mr Wilson said with a smile. "Where does it come from?"

"It's from Poland. I'm from Poland, I moved here a couple of days ago"

"My, my, my, I hope you didn't come all this way just to work for me" he joked as Natalia giggled. "Your English is perfect though"

"Thank you, Sir" she said, blushing.

She was glad to know that she could be understood even though she still had a hard time with her verb tenses.

"So. What I need is someone to run the cashier from time to time and help the guys putting the merchandise on the display stands"

"I can do that" Natalia said with confidence.

"I'm sure you can. Let's just say… I'm gonna let you try for a week or two and if everything's going fine then I'll keep you permanently, how's that sound?"

"Terrific" she replied, smiling big.

"Great! So I'll see you on Monday morning, 8 o'clock?"

"Perfect. Thank you, Sir, you won't regret your decision"

She shook his hand and left. Natalia was moving in her new apartment the next day and she was proud to say that she already found a job after only a few days in America.

_**Friday morning, in Natalia's apartment…**_

Natalia woke up in her bed, nauseous. She stayed in her bed for a while, hoping it would pass, but it didn't. She walked to the bathroom, holding her stomach, and sat next to the toilet. She hadn't felt absolutely great since the 'seasick' episode. She took her hair in one hand, resting the other on the side of the toilet, and she threw up. She panted a little then threw up a second time. When everything seemed under control, she stood up and looked at herself in the mirror. See her reflection was still weird. She hadn't seen herself for about two years.

She thought that going to the doctor's office would be a great idea since she had been sick for the last few days and it could be serious. She would go on Monday after her first day of work.

_**Monday…**_

Her first day of work went perfectly well. The guys were all kind and nice and they treated her like a normal person, not inferiorly because she was a woman. She liked the people and the work too. She was now sitting in the waiting room at the doctor's office.

"Natalia Kovalska?" the doctor called as he walked into the room.

Natalia stood up and followed him in his office.

"What can I do for you, my dear?"

"Well, uhm, I crossed the Atlantic Ocean last week and got sea sick. Since I got back, I keep feeling dizzy and I throw up sometimes. I'm nauseous most of the time" Natalia explained.

"Alright…" he said as he wrote everything down on a document. "We'll run some tests and see what's going on"

_**A week later…**_

Natalia was waiting in the doctor's office, again, for her tests results.

"Good afternoon Mrs Kovalska" the doctor greeted her when he entered his office, holding a folder.

"Good afternoon. Is it serious?" she asked quickly. "You know, doctor, I got some of these nauseas a few days this week"

"Don't worry, it's perfectly normal, my dear" he reassured.

"It is?" she asked, confused.

"Morning sickness is usual in the first months of pregnancy"

Natalia looked at him with distress. The doctor didn't seem to notice her reaction. He couldn't suspect anything anyway, she had a ring on her left hand, didn't she?

"Congratulations" he simply said, instead.

She faked a smile and left the building. She ran as fast as she could, crying profusely. People were turning around when she ran passed them but she couldn't care less. _Never turn around_.

_**At the apartment…**_

Natalia locked herself in the bedroom. She stared at her reflection in the mirror then screamed with distress and culpability. Then, she punched herself in the stomach, using both her fists, for a few minutes. She didn't want this baby, it was way too much for her to handle right now.

"Die! Die!" she repeated to the little thing inside of her.

She finally let herself fall against the wall and buried her face in her hands before screaming again.

_**That night, at Emily's…**_

The phone rang after the two girls finished eating their dinner.

"It must be Zachary" Emily exclaimed. "Do you want to talk to him?" she asked Natalia.

Natalia nodded and barely listened when Emily talked to her son through the phone.

"Natalia? Zachary wants to talk to you. You can go in the den if you want to talk privately" Emily proposed.

"Thanks" she said, forcing a smile.

She walked to the den and sat on the black chair then took the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey, how are you?" Zachary asked, happy to hear her voice.

He hadn't talked to her since she left Poland, two weeks before. Natalia didn't reply anything. She was too busy trying to keep her emotions inside.

"What is it, Talia? My mother said that you went to the doctor today?"

Talia. That was how her mother used to call her and nobody ever used that name except her. And she didn't tell Emily why she went to the doctor.

"It's nothing, I'm fine" she lied.

"I can tell when you're lying, Natalia. What is it?" he asked again.

"I need you, Zachary" she said, holding back her tears.

Zachary could tell, just by hearing her voice, that she was about to burst into tears. He panicked a little and ran a hand in his hair.

"Natalia, beautiful, tell me what happened at the doctor's office. What did he say to make you feel like that?"

"_I'm pregnant_" she admitted, bursting into tears.

She told him in Polish so his mother couldn't understand if she ever heard. Zachary stopped breathing for what seemed to be eternity. He fisted his hair and pulled, trying to keep himself awake, his feet firmly on the ground. He asked himself so many questions about Josef and Natalia and with what she just told him, she answered probably half of them.

"I can't come back now, I'll be home in about a month or so"

"I don't want this thing" she said with disgust. "I just wish it'd die" she sobbed.

Zachary didn't know why but he felt anger inside of him.

"You're going to keep this child, is that clear?" he said angrily.

"No! I can't!"

"You can and you will"

"It's mine, I'm gonna do what I want with it"

"You don't touch this baby!" he yelled through the phone.

"I can't take care of a baby. I'm only twenty, I can barely take care of myself. I don't know anything about life" she justified.

"Natalia" Zachary began, more calm. "You know I'll always be there for you, and if it means that I have to be there for a child too, then I will. Listen to me, this baby didn't ask to be there so you can't just kill it as if everything that happened was its fault. I know what you feel Natalia, believe me, because I lost the person I loved the most in the world and it hurts like hell" he explained, tearing up. "You have a 2,000$ ring on your finger but it's nothing but material. This ring will never have feelings for you!"

"You don't understand anything, Zachary! You think you do but you don't!"

"Oh yeah? You know, in the fall of 1939, I met this amazing girl and I fell in love with her. And then, one day, I saw her leave and even though I did everything I could to help her, when I found her, she had replaced me and was engaged"

Natalia said nothing but she bit her lip, holding back the new batch of tears that were threatening to escape.

"But I forgive her because, like I said, I love her. I just want to say that, one day, you might regret what you've done to this kid if you allow yourself to get rid of it. That little baby that you're going to give life to, it's gonna love you no matter what you're doing, even in your mistakes. It's going to give you a hard time but you're gonna forget everything as soon as it's gonna wrap its little arms around your neck, apologizing. And most of all, it's gonna call you 'mommy' and that, you wouldn't trade it for anything because you'll never feel something as satisfying in your whole life"

"I'm scared" she confessed, crying softly.

"I know it's a huge responsibility but you're not gonna be alone, that I can promise you"

How would people look at her? In 1944, you had to be married to have children. Or sex for that matter. She would be the neighborhood's whore. That's how she felt anyway.

"I'm just a slut. My sister even told me once" she sobbed.

"Hey! I don't want to hear you say that about yourself ever again, alright? It's not true and you know it. You were in love and it's ok to be, you did nothing wrong"

"Yeah, I did! I sinned! And more than just once"

"Listen, I sinned too, everybody did once in their life. People did things way more serious than you did. Just promise me that you won't do something you would regret to this baby. Promise me, alright?"

"I promise" she muttered.

"Fine. I'll talk to you next week, ok?"

"Sure"

"Could you put my mom back on the phone, please?"

"Yeah"

She told Emily that Zachary wanted to talk to her again. She thanked her for dinner and left. Once she was at her apartment, she took a long and hot bath to relax. She lay down, looked at her flat stomach and cried softly, thinking about the life that was growing there.


	22. Chapter 22

_**The next morning…**_

Natalia was brushing her teeth for the third time. She didn't get a good night of sleep, she kept worrying about her condition. She walked out of the bathroom and heard someone knock at the door. She opened it and saw Zachary's mother.

"Good morning" Emily said with a smile, holding a bag in her hand.

Natalia was still in her pajamas but she stepped to the side to let Mrs Stephens walk in. Zachary must have told her the news because she wouldn't have shown up at this hour with breakfast for her. They both sat at the kitchen table and Natalia ate the breakfast even though she wasn't hungry at all. She didn't want to throw up again but she wanted to be polite so she ate it all up.

"Thank you for the breakfast" she said as soon as she finished it.

"You're welcome. You know, you can always count on Zachary and me" Emily declared.

"I can't ask you something like that, Mrs Stephens" she murmured. "And much less to your son. I made a mistake, I am the one that have to deal with the consequences"

Emily smiled and shook her head slightly.

"You'll realize, someday, that this mistake is going to be the most beautiful gift life has given to you. Don't do anything stupid" she said, rubbing Natalia's back.

She left the apartment, leaving a confused young woman behind. The only thing Natalia was grateful for was that she had two friends to help her.

**December 16****th****, 1944, New Orleans, USA**

_**At the airport…**_

Natalia was waiting impatiently with Emily for passengers to appear at the end of the footbridge. She had talked with Zachary ever Friday night for the past month and a half and now that she was about to see him again, her heart beat faster. She didn't know why exactly.

"You go first" Emily said to Natalia.

"What? No, of course not. You haven't seen him in five years, he's your son, you have to go first. I can wait" she replied.

"Five minutes to five years, I should be able to make it"

"You sure?"

Emily nodded and Natalia looked back at the entrance. She saw an old lady coming out then a young man with a huge bag over his shoulder. She ran to him and jumped in his arms.

"Hey" Zachary whispered.

He dropped his bag on the ground and held her close. He wanted to kiss her, right now, but he knew it wouldn't be right after what happened between them. He put her down, tearing up, staring at her. The last time he had seen her, she was weak, sick, so skinny and scared. But now, she was glowing.

"You're beautiful" he said before pulling her into a hug.

"There's someone here that's dying to see you" Natalia whispered in his ear. "You should go find her"

"I'm dying to see her too" he admitted, looking around for his mother.

When he finally saw her, he ran to her and hugged her tight, as if he wouldn't ever let her go. Natalia saw that he was crying, still hugging his mother. This remembered her of her mother and how she couldn't hug her anymore. How she had been the last one to feel her touch before she died. How she saw her dead. She couldn't imagine how hard it must have been for her. Her son was gone to the war and she didn't know if he was alive until he would call her. Natalia hoped that she would never have to have that feeling as a mother. She knew what war was. She hadn't seen it on the television or heard it on the radio. She was there, she had seen it all. They left the airport and as they were waiting for a taxi, Zachary took Natalia's hand in his. Her heart beat faster. She intertwined their fingers and something electric happened. For the first time since she got to America, Natalia felt like she belonged there.

_**At home… **_

Zachary explored the house as if it was the first time he got there. Being at home felt great. He showed his bedroom to Natalia, talking about all of his memories, showing her all of his mentions and trophies.

"I have to show you something" he exclaimed after a while.

He took her hand and led her outside.

"But you just got here!"

"Come on!" he urged, ignoring what she said.

They walked for about fifteen minutes and stopped in front of a shed. He opened the squeaky door and Natalia tried to peek inside. There was something hidden under a black sheet. Zachary removed the sheet full of dust and Natalia sneezed.

"Tada!"

Natalia took a long look but couldn't see anything other than pieces of wood.

"What is it?" she asked, scared of offending him.

"That's a boat I started to build with my dad" he replied, not offended at all.

"I didn't know you love boats…" she admitted, running her fingers on the wood.

"It's one of my passions. When I was a kid, I used to sit at the port all day with my father and look at the boats as they passed by. That was our project" he explained, talking about the boat.

"I'm sorry, Zachary…"

He took a long look at the boat, remembering the moments with his father.

"Would you like us to finish it together?" he proposed.

"I don't know how to build a boat" she confessed. "Plus, I don't exactly have a great bound with them" she added, thinking back on the Atlantic Ocean adventure.

"I'll show you. Come on"

He unrolled a long sheet of paper on the table and stood behind Natalia. He explained her everything, pointing at the steps from under her arms.

"So?" he asked as he finished.

She turned around to look at him and nodded with a smile.

"Great" he smiled. "We should head home, dinner's going to be ready anytime soon"

They walked back home and Zachary held Natalia's hand, stroking the top of it with his thumb.

_**That night… **_

They were walking to Natalia's apartment, holding hands, eating an ice cream cone. Zachary walked her up to her door around eleven.

"Well, I'll see you tomorrow… Goodnight"

"Goodnight"

They looked at each other in silence then Natalia leaned up and kissed Zachary's lips softly. He pulled away after a minute.

"Goodnight" he whispered before leaving.


	23. Chapter 23

**December 25****th****, 1944, New Orleans, USA**

Zachary woke up, hearing the voices of the women he loved from the kitchen. His mother and his girlfriend, Natalia. He looked at the calendar and realized it was Christmas morning. He remembered that Natalia had spent the night here, in the guest room. He got up and walked to the kitchen.

"Good morning, sleepy head" his mother said as he entered the room.

"Smells good, mom" he said with a smile, kissing her cheek.

"It will be ready in a minute"

He walked to Natalia that was setting the table.

"Good morning" he said, bringing her closer. "And Merry Christmas" he added before kissing her.

"Merry Christmas" she blushed slightly.

She wasn't particularly fond of showing affection in front of Zachary's mother and he knew it. She still didn't know her that well and she was shy to kiss him in front of her or anybody for that matter.

_**A little later… **_

"This is for you" Zachary announced to Natalia as he gave her the biggest gift that was under the Christmas tree.

He sat behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Natalia tore up the paper to discover a big white box. She looked at Zachary, confused. She opened the box and took out a few pieces of wood.

"What is it?"

"A crib…"

"But –"

"You're gonna need one"

"It costs a fortune, you shouldn't – "

"It's my pleasure… And it wasn't that expensive"

She wrapped her arms around his neck, crying softly.

"Thank you so much… Thank you"

"I love you" he said in response.

Natalia looked down at the pieces of the crib then at Zachary again.

"I hope it includes the installation" she giggled.

"Of course" he replied with a smile.

He brought her closer and kissed her tenderly.

"I love you" he whispered again.

She said nothing back, she simply listened to his heartbeat. Zachary knew that she wasn't ready to tell him yet and it was ok, he understood. He just wanted her to know that he loved her.

_**Three months later… **_

Zachary entered Natalia's apartment and saw her lying under the sink.

"What are you doing in there?" he exclaimed, running to her.

She jumped and banged her head on the plumbing then laughed loudly.

"Get out of there!" he instructed.

He didn't think it was funny at all since she was five months pregnant.

"Relax!" she reassured him as she stood up. "There was a leak, alright?"

"Why didn't you ask me?"

She ignored him and turned on the faucet to see that everything was fine.

"Congratulations Talia" she congratulated herself.

She turned to Zachary and smiled, proud of her accomplishment. Her hair was in a ponytail and there were rebel strands here and there. She kissed Zachary lightly and brought him to the baby's room.

"Wow!" he said, shocked.

"I thought it would look better if the crib was there. Look" she said as she pointed everything she was talking about. "I painted a few stars next to it. And I succeeded, surprisingly, at making these drapes"

Zachary walked to the window and took the drape between his fingers. Natalia was persuaded that the baby was a boy so everything was blue.

"You did a great job"

"You think I should put a lamp near the rocking chair?"

"I'm sure it would be perfect"

"I saw one at the general store today, it fits the drapes"

"What are you going to do if it's a girl?"

"There's nothing wrong with a girl liking the color blue, you know. Blue is my favorite color" she explained.

She said nothing more but she thought of Josef's sapphire blue eyes then looked into Zachary's.

"What did you do today?"

"Me? Oh, nothing really. I worked in the garden with my mother" he lied.

He was finishing the boat for her because he wanted it to be a surprise before the baby's birth.

"Wanna go for ice cream?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Yes!" she almost yelled.

Ice cream was her pregnancy guilty pleasure. She would eat nothing else than that if she could.

_**One month later… **_

"Quick detour before ice cream" Zachary announced, putting a blindfold on Natalia's eyes.

She giggled and let Zachary guide her. She heard a squeak and knew where they were.

"Stay there, don't peek" he said, letting her stand not far from the boat.

Zachary got the boat ready and took off the blindfold. Natalia looked at the boat in wonder. The hull was navy blue and the surface of the boat was white. She looked back at Zachary, smiling.

"Do you like it?"

"Are you kidding? I love it" she replied.

"Wait 'til you see this" he said, taking her hand to lead her at the bow.

The letters N.A.T.A.L.I.A. were painted in white on the bow. She couldn't believe that he named the project he started with his father like her. She kissed him and Zachary led her inside the boat. There was a table surrounded by seats, a little kitchen and there was also a door on the other side of the room. Zachary opened the door and dragged her inside. There were lit candles and rose petals everywhere. He closed the door behind them and discreetly attached a gold chain on Natalia's neck. She gasped and looked down at it. He turned them around for her to see their reflection in the mirror. She ran her fingers on the chain and saw the ring that Zachary had put in it as a pendant.

"I love you, Natalia Alicja Kovalska" he whispered in her ear. "I love you since the first day I ever saw you"

A single tear escaped the young woman's eye in silence.

"Would you marry me?" he whispered.

"Yes" she choked out. "Yes" she repeated with more confidence, tearing up.

Zachary smiled and his heart beat faster, she had said yes. She turned around to look at him and murmured the three words he had waited for so long.

"I love you" she murmured before kissing him.

"I love you too" he said, holding her close. "And I promise to love you for the rest of my life"

He took the chain off her neck and picked the ring out of it. He slid it on Natalia's finger. He breathed out, trying to calm himself. He was nervous even though she had already said yes. She leaned up to him and crushed her lips onto his. She wrapped her arms around his neck. Zachary rested his hands on her waist and added passion to their kiss. None of them took the lead but they went to the bed. He ran his hand up her shirt and as soon as he touched her skin, he saw himself back in the treehouse, four years ago. He saw the young Natalia, the girl he had fall in love with. The one he would spend the rest of his life with. He kissed her neck then her jawline to reach her earlobe.

"You're beautiful" he whispered between two kisses.

And then they made love passionately, twice.

"You still want your ice cream?" he asked, a few minutes after their passionate love making.

"No" she giggled, cuddling up to him.

He looked down at her belly and then at her, smiling slightly.

"You thought about names yet?"

"Yeah I –" she began, resting her hand on his chest. "I thought about American or Polish names. You think I should choose an American name?"

"I think you should choose the one you like the most"

"Aleksander" she muttered.

"What?"

"Aleksander" she repeated. "That's the name I like"

"Can I ask you something?" he questioned, confused.

"Yes"

"Why do you want a boy so much?"

She simply shrugged, not bothering to say anything. He didn't insist but he thought he knew why. This baby wasn't his. It was Josef's. And Josef was dead. The only thing she had left of him was this baby and the ring he gave her. The ring was in one of her drawers with the letter he had written to her. Zachary's was on her bedside table, all used up. She read it every night before going to sleep. When Zachary was still away in Poland, she sometimes fell asleep holding it against her heart. Not knowing what Natalia was thinking about was killing Zachary. Did she think about Josef all the time? Or practically never? Or a few times a day? Did she still love him? This question was the most painful for him. And then, he realized that she wanted a boy so she could always remember his father, Josef. He stroked Natalia's hair for a while and saw that she had fallen asleep, her head on his chest. He kissed her forehead and closed his eyes.


	24. Chapter 24

_**Later… **_

When Natalia woke up, she had lost any track of the time and was confused at where she was. She felt Zachary's arms around her and remembered that they were still in the boat. She tried to look at Zachary's watch without waking him up but he woke up in a jump when he felt her hand on his arm. He looked around, confused as well.

"What time is it?" he asked, sleepy.

"Five thirty in the morning" she replied.

"We over slept our little nap" he said with a smile. "Did you sleep well?"

"Like a baby"

She cuddled up to him, wrapping her arm around his stomach. He looked down at her arm and saw something he'd never noticed before. He ran his finger on the A-2943 that was written on her arm as she looked carefully each one of his moves.

"Marked like beasts" she declared, her face half-buried in Zachary's chest. "You can marry Natalia Alicja Kovalska or A-2943 if you prefer"

"It's horrible" he murmured, still stroking her arm.

She said nothing. There was a number on her arm. What could she do about it? Absolutely nothing.

"Did you try to take it off?"

"Yes" she said, looking up at him. "I used any existing detergent. It's kind of tattooed. I remember it hurt like hell when they did it. Number or not, I'll never forget what happened, so what? It's not like it's in the middle of my forehead or anything, I can hide it with my clothes"

"Well it doesn't mean anything now because you're Natalia Kovalska. And soon-to-be Mrs Zachary Stephens"

"Can you say it again?" she asked, smiling slightly. "Only the last part…"

"Mrs Zachary Stephens" he repeated before kissing her soft lips.

_**July 5**__**th**__**, 1945…**_

It was the middle of the night when Natalia walked to the couch where Zachary was sleeping.

"Zachary?" she whispered, shaking his shoulder.

"What is it?" he asked, his eyes still closed.

"The baby… I think it's coming"

He opened his eyes and jumped up the couch.

"Are you ok?" he asked nervously.

"It hurts" she groaned, clutching her belly.

"Ok, hum, just lie down on your bed, I'll call the midwife"

They were living on the countryside so there was no hospital nearby.

"_Hurry_!" she screamed in her mother language.

_**Five hours later… **_

Zachary was with his mother in the living room, pacing like a maniac. He could hear Natalia screaming and he didn't like it but no one was allowed in the bedroom. The midwife didn't want anybody around and Natalia seemed to be okay with that.

"I can't take it anymore, mom! How long is it supposed to take?"

Emily smiled at how cute he was when he worried about Natalia.

"It's the first one, honey, it takes hours, you know"

He heard a baby crying and realized it was done over with. He ran to the bedroom door and knocked. He could hear Natalia crying from the other side.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

"Everything went perfectly well" the midwife said as she opened the door. "It's a baby boy" she smiled.

Zachary smiled at both the good news and walked to the bed as the midwife walked out of the room, closing the door. He could already see Natalia's tears. He sat on the bed and kissed her forehead, wiping away her tears. He looked down at the baby in her arms and a lump grew in his throat. He wrapped an arm around Natalia's shoulders and she cuddled up to him.

"Shh" he whispered.

"It's my fault" she sobbed. "He's like that because of me"

He brought her closer and kissed her head, holding back the tears. The newborn had a cheek distortion and his left eye seemed smaller because of that. It wasn't that noticeable from a distance but it was for Natalia. Natalia thought back of those nights where she punched her own stomach, hoping the baby would die. She closed her eyes, hating herself.

"Did you name him like you wanted to?" he asked, kissing her temple.

"Mmm, mmm" she replied, tearing up. "Aleksander Andrzej Kovalski" she specified. "My little prince"

Zachary smiled down at her. He knew she wouldn't regret keeping the baby. He had never seen a smile as sincere as the one she was wearing right now.

"And they're gonna have to kill me before they touch or hurt him"

She kissed the baby's head.

"The midwife said it's nothing serious, you know, his face. Time can replace it but sometimes it needs an operation"

"He's a strong little boy, just like his mom. He'll get through this like a champ"

"Thank you, Zachary…"

"For what?"

"For stopping me when I tried to get rid of him… Your mother was right, it's the best gift I could ever ask for"


	25. Chapter 25

_**Six months later… **_

Aleksander was an easy baby. He was already sleeping his whole nights since he was two weeks old and he was really quiet. Natalia was worried, she even checked a few times on him in the middle of the night to be sure he was still breathing. After six months, he barely cried or babbled. He was looking at his mother with shiny eyes every time she came close and he would patiently wait for her to pick him up in her arms. Each time Zachary was coming to spend an evening with her, she would let her feelings escape because she knew that Aleksander had a problem.

"Maybe you should see a doctor with him, he could tell you if there's something wrong" Zachary proposed, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "I can go with you if you want"

"You see, that's exactly the problem, Zachary. I don't want a doctor to tell me that my son has a problem, serious or not. He - "

"You have to know, Natalia, if we want to do something to help him. It's not normal for him to – "

"I know that! You think I don't know that?" she exclaimed, getting up from the couch.

Zachary kept quiet, knowing it wouldn't lead anywhere to fight with her. He knew it was hurting her when he talked about that. He looked at her, her back facing him. She bowed her head and started to cry softly. He got up and walked to her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her hair.

"I'm sorry, okay? I know it's hurting you when I talk about that, I shouldn't have brought the subject. I just want you to understand…"

"I don't have any money to bring him to the doctor, Zachary. That's why I'm not going and try to live like everything's fine"

"Well why didn't you say so?" he asked. "I'll go to the doctor with you, I'll take care of that"

"No! Stop it, Zachary!" she exclaimed, getting away from him.

"What?" he asked, confused. "What did I do?"

"You take out your wallet every time! Aleksander is my son, alright? MY son. You don't have to pay anything, you're not his father" she said coldly.

Zachary felt his heart drop.

"If you wait for his father to do something, you're gonna wait for a long time!" he shouted. "I just want to help you but you keep pushing me away. If you don't want me in your life, why don't you just say so?"

"That's not what I meant!" she cried. "You know I love you"

"You love me? Are you in love with me?"

She looked into his eyes and even though she saw the anger, she said nothing. Zachary shook his head slightly, sighing.

"Stop holding on to that thought, Natalia, he won't come back. He's dead!"

"I know he won't come back! No one will ever come back! Don't you get it? I have no one left!"

"Then stop using me like an emergency door or something! I'm not here to be some kind of crutches, alright? If you tell me that you're still in love with him, I won't marry you like a desperate idiot. I wanna get married to a woman with whom I'm gonna spend the rest of my life and that will love me as much as I love her"

"If you think you love me more than I do then kiss my ass!" she yelled back. "You think I broke your heart?"

"You did! You did break my heart!"

"I'm gonna tell you something, Private Stephens" she said with attitude. "You broke my heart way before I broke yours!"

"Listen, if you think I can't live without you, you – "

He interrupted himself and rushed to her. He kissed her fiercely and closed his eyes.

"You're perfectly right" he finished his sentence after their kiss. "I love you even if you're a pain in the ass sometimes. You can be an idiot or act like a baby but I don't care, I love you because of that. Don't you dare change!"

"I love you too, even if you think I'm an idiot. You're an idiot too by the way" she giggled.

"I know I'm not Aleksander's father and if you're going to tell him the truth, that's fine with me, but I'll be there for him even though he doesn't have any of my blood. He has yours and that's enough for me"

"I saved some money in a box, for the operation"

"You mean for his face?"

Natalia nodded.

"And that's why you don't bring him to the doctor for a check-up?"

"Kind of" she replied. "I only have 200$ for now and the operation is around 2,000$. I had to buy groceries with my last check so I couldn't save any money"

"How long have you been saving up?"

"Since Aleksander's birth" she muttered, looking down.

Zachary didn't know what to say to this heartbreaking confession. Seven months. 200$. He thought about the money he had and felt bad.

"But I've been able to buy enough food to hold on 'til next week. If I'm careful, I'm going to have some until Wednesday then there will only be two days before the next paycheck" Natalia explained, proud of how she sorted everything out.

"What about those two days? What are you going to do?"

"Well there's enough food for the baby, that's for sure. As for me, I don't eat" she admitted as if that was totally normal.

"You mean you don't eat for two days?"

"Mr Wilson let me eat an apple sometimes during my afternoon break. I knew starvation, Zachary, for three years, and believe me, I'm living in luxury here"

"Well come at my house when you have nothing to eat"

"I decided to live by myself and I'm going to keep it this way but thank you anyways"

"If you're hungry, I want you to come home, alright?"

She nodded and kissed him.

_**Two days later, to the doctor's office…**_

Natalia was in the waiting room, waiting for the doctor to call Aleksander's name. The little boy was sit on his mother's lap, looking at the other kids in the playing area.

"Do you want to go play with them, baby?" she asked him, bringing her face closer to his.

He looked at her with puppy-dog eyes as if he didn't quite understand what she was saying. She repeated slowly but he kept staring at her. She walked to the playing area with Aleksander in her arms. Everybody was looking at him. Natalia tried to ignore them and sat with the boy on the ground, bending down to be face to face with him.

"Wanna play with the others?"

He stayed there, looking at her. She looked at him, working hard not to cry. She took a ball that was next to them and gave it to her son, waiting for something. Aleksander looked at it and tossed it away. Natalia tried again and again but he kept tossing it away. Tearing up, she gave up as the other mothers looked at her. She picked up her son and walked back to her seat.

"_I love you_" she whispered to Aleksander, kissing his head.


	26. Chapter 26

"He's really quiet. He doesn't show any need, I have to check on him. He's not like any other child is supposed to be" Natalia explained to the doctor. "I thought, maybe, maybe he's deaf…"

"It could be a possibility but he seems alright. Aleksander?" he called out.

The baby turned his head to him. The doctor checked his ears to be sure but everything was perfectly fine.

"I'd have to observe him a couple of times to be able to analyze his behavior. It may be a development issue but I don't want to jump to conclusions until I analyzed the possibilities"

"You mean he could be retarded?" she asked, shocked.

"In other words, yes" he admitted.

"But, no – No… My son isn't… No" she denied.

"Like I said, I can't jump to conclusions before I analyzed the problem, if there's one" he reassured. "If you could come back on next Saturday, I'll be able to observe Aleksander and understand his behavior. You can bring his teddy if you want to"

_**A month later…**_

"After four weeks of analyzing, I'd have to tell you that Aleksander is suffering from infantile autism" the doctor declared.

"Wh – What is it?" Natalia stuttered, worried.

"It's a pervasive behavior trouble, abnormal or deficient, with a disturbance in his social interactions, his communication and behavior"

Nice words to say 'retarded', she thought.

_**Outside…**_

Zachary was waiting for them in the car and finally saw Natalia coming out of the clinic, Aleksander in her arms. She opened the door and got into the car, Aleksander on her lap.

"So?" Zachary asked. "Did the doctor say anything?"

"He said that Aleksander has an infantile autism" she explained, a lump in her throat.

"What is that? What does that mean?"

"It means he's retarded" she said, looking up at him with tears in her eyes. "What did – Why him?"

Zachary wrapped his arms around her and brought her closer, knowing that saying nothing and let her cry was the best thing to do. Aleksander pulled on Zachary's shirt, sitting between them. He kissed the baby's head and joined him to the hug.

"Everything's going to be fine, I promise. Everything's going to be fine" Zachary whispered.

He wouldn't let anybody hurt the little boy in any way. No one would bully him or do any violence towards him. He would take care of the one that would dare hurting him.

**New Orleans, USA, March 1946**

The phone rang at the Stephens' home and Emily ran to the phone along with Zachary who thought it would be Natalia, calling for an emergency of any kind.

"Hello?" Emily answered since she beat Zachary at the run.

"Hello… I… Talk to Natalia" a man's voice said with a terrible accent.

"Oh well, Natalia's not living here anymore, my dear" she said as she looked at Zachary.

"Who is it?" Zachary whispered to his mother.

"Excuse me, who am I talking to?" she asked so she could answer her son's question.

"Friend" he simply said.

"Oh… Well, would you like to have the number to reach her?"

"What? Mom!"

"Shh! Be quiet, will you? Fine, it's 504-555-6827"

"Thank you"

"You are welcome. Bye"

She hung up and looked at Zachary.

"Who was that?" he asked.

"He said he was Natalia's friend"

"What's his name?"

"The poor guy could barely speak English so I didn't ask too much"

"What?"

He took his coat and ran out the door.

_**Meanwhile… **_

Natalia walked out of Aleksander's room as the phone rang. She ran to it, hoping it wouldn't wake up the baby. It took 45 minutes to get him to sleep.

"Hello?" she answered, breathless.

"Natalia?"

"Who is this?" she asked, feeling guilty of not recognizing who it was.


	27. Chapter 27

"Who is it?" Natalia asked, feeling guilty for not recognizing who it was.

"Henryk…"

Natalia's body froze.

"_Henryk? As in my brother Henryk?_"

"_It's me Natalia_" Henryk said, a lump in his throat.

"_How did you find me_?" she asked. "_Are you still living in Warsaw_?"

There were so many things she wanted to know.

"_No, I live in London now… I asked the Embassy if they ever heard about you. They found out you've been able to run away to the United States_"

Natalia felt tears in her eyes and she gulped away her sorrow.

"_Is Daddy still alive? What about Andrzej_?"

"_They didn't make it… Dad was brought into the gas chamber three weeks after we've been there… And Andrzej got shot four days before we were released_…" he confessed after a long moment of silence.

His eyes were tearing up when he thought about his father leaving the chimney in ashes and the blood of his brother flowing between his feet. A tear rolled down Natalia's cheek when she realized Henryk was the only family she had left.

"_What about Bella_?" Henryk asked, hopeful.

"_She got killed_" she said, a lump in her throat. "_She got killed when we were running away_"

That was quiet for a few minutes.

"_And how are you? What's America like_?"

"_Fine… I – I'm engaged. I also have a son… But that's a long story_"

She couldn't see her brother but she knew what his face probably looked like right now. His little sister wasn't 22 yet and she had had a child without being married.

"_How old is he? What's his name_?"

She smiled slightly.

"_His name's Aleksander and he's almost nine months old. He has this thing… It's called infantile autism_"

"_What is that? He's gonna be fine, right_?"

Natalia couldn't believe he was worried about him even though he didn't see him once in his life.

"_It's going to cause trouble in his learning and social abilities and his behavior will be different from any normal kid. But he's going to be alright… And Zachary is helping me a lot with him_"

"_I'm guessing Zachary is the man you're engaged to_?"

"_Yeah_" she said, looking down at her ring with a smile. "_He is an amazing person, I'm sure you'd like him_"

"_If he respects and takes care of you then I like him for sure_"

"_He does_…"

"_Perfect. Does Aleksander look like you_?"

"_A little… He has my nose and my lips but he looks more like his father_"

"_Zachary, right_?" he asked, not sure if he remembered the name correctly.

"_No, actually… Zachary is not Aleksander's father_"

"_Oh… Well, is he still around? The father I mean_"

"_N – No, he's not. But that's a long story too. And that's not a story that I want you to hear on the phone like that because it's too much for me to handle_" she confessed on the verge of tears.

She heard nothing from her brother and she realized he was crying.

"_I love you Natalia_…"

"_I love you too_" she sobbed.

To hear her big brother's voice telling her that he loved her gave her an incredible strength. To know that he was still alive and that he cared about where she was and what she did become.

"_I know I've never been a good brother to you… But I miss you so so much and I regret not telling you how much I loved you when you needed it the most_"

"_Well I was a pain in the ass_" she giggled in her tears.

"_Yeah, you were_" he chuckled, wiping his tears away.

"_What are you doing in London_?"

"_Well believe it or not, I was first supposed to go to Prague but then I decided London would be great_"

"_I've been in America for a year and a half now and I really love it. You should come here someday_"

Zachary entered the apartment, hearing Natalia speaking her mother language. As soon as she saw him, she mouthed to him to be quiet because the baby was asleep.

"_Hold on for a second_" she told her brother. "Everything is fine, Zachary, you can go home" she said. "I'll tell you all about it tomorrow"

"Alright" he smiled. "Call me if you need anything. I love you" he said as he left.

**New Orleans, USA, May 1946**

They were at the airport, Natalia, Aleksander and Zachary. They were waiting at the gate for the people to come out. Zachary was holding the baby in his arms.

"Nervous?" he asked Natalia when he saw that she was shuffling her feet.

"I haven't slept in two days" she admitted. "I'm excited"

Henryk was the only sibling of Natalia's he hadn't met and he was nervous too. Especially because he came to America for his wedding to his little sister. He looked at the people coming out and realized he didn't know what Henryk looked like. Natalia ran to the gate and jumped in the arms of a man in his old twenties. Zachary stayed back with Aleksander, looking at them. Henryk hugged his sister tight then put her down.

"_Excuse me, miss, but I'm looking for my little sister, have you seen her_?" he joked.

He couldn't believe how much she had changed. Natalia laughed and hugged him again.

"_You're breathtaking_" he whispered in her ear as they hugged.

Natalia blushed and brought him to Zachary and Aleksander, a huge smile on her face.

"_Henryk, I want you to meet Zachary, my fiancé_"

He smiled and shook Zachary's hand.

"_It's nice to finally meet you_"

"_It's nice to meet you too_"

Natalia took Aleksander from Zachary's arms and introduced him to his uncle.

"Look, baby, it's Uncle Henryk"

She knew it wouldn't be easy, Aleksander was like in a bubble and it had to be respected, especially by strangers.

"Do you want to say hi?" she asked softly.

Aleksander nodded slowly, looking at her. She took his hand and they waved together at Henryk.

"Hi" he replied to his nephew that already had his face hidden in his mother's neck. "_Which reminds me, I brought him a little something from England_"

He opened his carry-on and took out a stuffed dog before holding it out for him. Aleksander took a long look at it, always with his puppy-dog eyes.

"You can take it, baby, it's for you" Natalia explained to him before smiling to her brother.

He took the dog from Henryk's hands and hugged it tightly immediately as Natalia giggled.

"Do you like the gift Uncle Henryk brought you?" she whispered to Aleksander, knowing he liked to have 'secrets' with her.

He nodded and hugged the stuffed animal again. Natalia kissed her head as he buried his face in her neck. He always did so in public. Natalia found that extremely hard that a son, a 11-months-old baby, couldn't talk yet except to say 'mommy', 'yes' and 'no'. He loved the last one, too much sometimes.


	28. Chapter 28

**New Orleans, USA, May 28, 1946 **

"You can't Zachary! I told you at least fifteen times. Now stop being a baby and let me help you with that" Emily said, talking about his bow tie.

"Come on, what is this stupid 'it brings bad luck' thing anyways? I'm dying here! I want to see her wearing her wedding dress"

"You will. When she'll walk down the aisle"

"I meant alone"

"After the ceremony then"

Zachary sighed then smiled, realizing that he was finally getting married to the woman he met seven years ago, so far away from home. That was true then, you can't expect love much less who you fall in love with. The only thing that was hurting him on this beautiful day was that Natalia's family, with the exception of Henryk, wasn't there to share that special day with her. He also knew it was painful for her even though she tried to prove otherwise. She admitted to him, two days ago, that she couldn't remember how her father looked like before bursting into tears.

_**Later that day… **_

Zachary heard the wedding march play and when he saw Natalia walking down the aisle with her brother, he wanted to cry. She was so beautiful. Henryk stopped at the front and kissed Natalia's forehead then gave her hand to Zachary.

"_Take care of her_"

"_You can count on it_"

He took Natalia's hand and helped her up the few stairs. She looked up at him and smiled.

20 minutes later…

"Natalia Alicja Kovalska, do you take Zachary, here, to be your lawfully wedded husband?" the priest asked.

"Yes, yes I do" she said, smiling at Zachary.

"Zachary Jonathan Stephens, do you take Natalia, here, to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do"

They exchanged their rings and Zachary looked deeply into Natalia's eyes.

"You may now kiss the bride"

Zachary cupped Natalia's face in his hands and kissed her softly. He was still feeling those crazy butterflies each time he kissed her. Natalia touched Zachary's cheeked after pulling away to be sure she wasn't dreaming and all of this was real. When she realized that all of this really happened, a huge smile appeared on her face.

_**Later that night, after the reception, around 10pm…**_

Zachary put a blindfold on Natalia's eyes and walked her to the car.

"Where are we going?" she asked as Zachary drove the car out of the driveway.

"It's a surprise. I wouldn't put a blindfold on your eyes if it wasn't"

"Come on, just a hint" she said, excited.

"You can ask as many questions as you like, I won't tell anything until we get there"

A while later…

Zachary helped his wife out of the car.

"What is it this time?"

She wanted to rip the blindfold off.

"My wedding gift for you..."

"It's our wedding, you don't have to give me anything"

"Well it's for the both of us but you deserve it more than I do" he said, kissing her temple.

"You're making me nervous, now, come on"

He took the blindfold off and she gasped at what was in front of her.

"What is this?"

"It's a house"

"Thank you, I can see that"

"You can also say that it's ours"

She turned around, speechless, and threw her arms around his neck, thanking him non-stop between the kisses they shared.

"Come on, I'll show you the inside"

He took her hand and they walked inside the house. When they entered, they were in the kitchen and the living room was on their right. At their left was a long staircase. At the back of the kitchen was a corridor with two doors, the master bedroom and the bathroom. Zachary led Natalia upstairs where they found three closed doors.

"Why so much space?" she questioned.

"To start our family" he said, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind.

She turned around to him, smiling.

"If you want to, of course"

"Of course I want to"

He smiled softly and pecked her lips. He showed her every room of the house, ending with their bedroom. She looked around in wonder.

"Do you like it?" he asked after she had explored the whole room.

"I absolutely love it" she replied as she looked at him.

"I'm glad you like it. I did everything by myself"

"It's beautiful"

She kissed him deeply and allowed him to slip his tongue in her mouth. She closed her eyes to enjoy every second of it and finally pulled away. Zachary kissed and sucked on her neck. Natalia unbuttoned his shirt as fast as possible. She discarded the useless item for what they were about to do. She felt Zachary's hand trying to unzip her dress as she did so. She unbuttoned his pants, catching his lips in a passionate kiss. They were wearing nothing but their underwear now. Zachary lied her down on the bed and got on top of her, holding his weight. He kissed her neck and slowly lowered to her breast. Natalia ran her hands in Zachary's hair, biting her lip to hold back the early moans that were battling to escape her throat. He trailed down his kisses to her stomach then came back to her lips. He slowly unclasped her bra and took off her panties before removing his own underwear. They kissed a little more and Zachary slowly entered Natalia. She wrapped her arms around his neck and moved her hips in synch with his, causing her to moan softly.

"I love you" she purred in his ear as he was nibbling her earlobe.

Those simple words brought his lips onto hers and they reached their climax together a few minutes later.

"I love you too" he whispered as Natalia put her head down on his chest.

He kissed her head and stroked her hair, watching her drift into sleep.


	29. Chapter 29

**New Orleans, USA, Summer 1956 **

Natalia was sitting on the balcony, reading a book on this wonderful day of July. Zachary was gone to work and the kids were playing outside. The baby was in his seat at her feet and was sleeping soundly.

_**Meanwhile…**_

The kids could see their mother on the balcony but she was too far to hear their voices unless they shouted.

"I say we play battles" Michael, 5, said.

"Mommy doesn't want us to play that game" Aleksander, 10, reminded him.

He hated that game because he was always the victim of his siblings.

"If we go behind the barn, she won't hear us. Who wants to play?" Michael asked.

"I do!" Daniel, 8, agreed, raising his hand.

"I do too but only if I can be the princess" Maria, 7, said.

"There is no princess in that game, Maria!" Michael told her, rolling his eyes.

"Next time we're going to play, I want to be the princess"

"Whatever!"

"Can I be the captain?" Jessica, 4, asked her brother.

"You can be my assistant if you want"

"Ok!"

They all ran behind the barn without their mother noticing.

"We have to split teams" Daniel declared. "I choose Maria. Michael, you can keep Jessica and Aleksander"

"I don't want him, you keep him"

"No! It was your idea to play so you take him"

"He can be in his own team" Maria proposed.

"Yeah, let's do that" Aleksander agreed, looking down.

Michael ran off with his little sister as the others found their own way somewhere else.

_**Ten minutes later… **_

Aleksander had his back against the barn as his four younger siblings were in front of him, pointing sticks at him.

"We kidnapped you, stupid, and now you're in our possession" Maria said.

"You're the one that's stupid!" Aleksander riposted.

"Prisoners can't talk! You know the rules!" Daniel pointed out.

"Aleksander is cryinggggg. He's just a big babyyyyyy!" Jessica sang.

"Stop saying that!" he exclaimed, tearing up.

"You're weak! And scared!" Daniel exclaimed.

"POW! POW! POW!" Michael yelled, pointing his stick at his brother.

Natalia stood up and took Jimmy in her arms before walking fast to the barn.

"Michael Cameron Stephens!" she shouted before even reaching them.

Michael closed his eyes, knowing he was in trouble. Just because she said his full name. He saw her appeared at their left and forced a smile, letting go of his stick.

"Hi mom"

She saw Aleksander crying against the wall and the four others looking at her with puppy-dog eyes, aware that they were in trouble.

"How many times I told you I don't want you to play battles? War and guns are not a game!" she shouted at them. "And you, young man" she added as she pointed Michael. "Stop dragging your brothers and sisters into your silly ideas"

"Bu – "

"No buts! Your rooms, now!" she obliged, pointing the house. "And you won't come out until Daddy's home"

"Nooooo!" they all whined.

"I don't want to hear anything. Now, come on" she said, more calm.

They all walked pass her.

"You don't have to go, baby" she told Aleksander, knowing perfectly that he didn't have anything to do with this.

"That's ok mommy, I played too"

She kissed his head and he walked to the house as she followed him, holding the baby.

"I told you I should have been the princess" Maria whispered to Michael as they walked to the house.

"Maria, not a word" Natalia recalled from the back.

_**Inside…**_

"Upstairs" Natalia repeated, putting Jimmy down in his seat.

Her afternoon break was over. It had lasted 15 minutes. She looked at them as they walked upstairs and listened until she heard the three doors closing. Michael and Daniel were sharing one. Maria and Jessica were sharing another one and Aleksander had his own room because of his insomnia problems. He shared, most of the time, his bed with Angel, their female German Shepherd.

_**Around 6 o'clock…**_

Zachary entered the house as Natalia was cooking dinner. She turned around when she heard the door close.

"Hey" she greeted with a smile.

"Hey" he replied as he walked to her to kiss her. "Where are the kids?" he asked with a frown.

"In their rooms, thinking about what they did"

"And that would be?"

"Play war and guns. Again"

"Let me guess… Michael?"

"No kidding" she scoffed.

"Mommy?" a voice asked from up the stairs.

"What baby?" Natalia asked back.

"Can we come down now? I think I heard Daddy's voice" Jessica said.

"Come down and line up to wash your hands" she instructed, smiling at Zachary.

An earthquake happened in the staircase and the five kids appeared in the kitchen.

"Daddy!" Jessica exclaimed, running to her father.

She jumped in his arms like every night when he came back from work. The others lined up in front of the sink.

"How's my princess" he asked, kissing her cheek.

"I'm fine"

"Great. Now go wash your hands, dinner's ready" he repeated Natalia's instruction, patting her butt.

Jessica ran off to the sink waiting for her turn.

"Mommy" she said as her turn came.

Natalia picked her up and sat her on the counter. Jessica washed her hands then held them out.

"Do they smell good?" she asked Natalia, as usual.

"Perfect" she confirmed after smelling her daughter's hands.

She kissed her forehead and put her down. She rolled up her sleeves and started filling the plates before serving them.

"Yum, spaghetti. Thank you, mommy!" Maria said as Natalia put her plate down in front of her.

"Hey, you wait until everyone's served, young lady" she reminded her as she put Michael's plate down.

"Mommy" Michael asked with a frown. "Why do you have those numbers on your arm?" he added, noticing them for the first time.

"I want to see!" Jessica exclaimed.

"No, baby" Natalia said to Jessica. "And that's a story I don't want you to hear, honey" she told Michael.

"You're too young to understand" Aleksander said, causing everyone to look at him.

Natalia looked at Zachary then they both looked at Aleksander.

"What exactly do you mean by that?"

"The story, mommy. I know where these numbers come from"

"You do?"

"Yes" he simply replied, all eyes on him.

"Where did you learn that?" Natalia demanded, panicked that her ten-year-old knew about this and how much exactly he knew.

"In some books I took at the library"

"And the lady let you take these books?" she asked, on the verge of tears.

"Well, yeah" he stuttered.

"Where is it?"

"Where's what?"

"The book, Aleksander, the book!"

"It's in my room"

He didn't finish his sentence and she was already climbing the stairs two by two. She ran to Aleksander's room and searched the book everywhere, finding it under his bed. She looked quickly inside and started to cry. She ran downstairs, tears streaming down her face. She stood in the entrance as everybody looked at her and she began tearing the pages in front of them. No one was talking and nobody understood what was going on except for Zachary and maybe Aleksander. Jessica started to cry when she realized her mother was sobbing.

"I'm sorry" Aleksander apologized.

"I can't believe how stupid you are!" Daniel exclaimed.

"Daniel! Don't talk to your brother like that!" Zachary warned.

He stood from his chair and walked to Natalia, trying to calm her down.

"They destroyed my whole life" she cried as Zachary held her tight.

"Is she talking about us?" Maria whispered.

"No… I think she means the people that wrote that book…" Michael whispered back.

"That's neither of that" Aleksander clarified. "You don't know anything. You're too young to understand"

"You are too, mister!" Natalia exclaimed, pulling away from Zachary's arms.

"Can I eat my spaghetti now?" Maria asked.

Natalia kicked away the remains of the book and finished serving the plates. She sat across Zac with the children on each side of the table. She forced herself to eat because the whole situation had taken away her appetite. There wasn't much noise during dinner except for the clinging of the utensils against the plates.

"Thanks for dinner, mommy, it was good" Daniel finally spoke.

"You're welcome" she replied with a soft smile.

"Can I have some more?"

"Danny, wait until mom finishes her plate" Zachary told him.

"No, that's ok" she said as she got up.

She filled Daniel's plate and walked back to the table, putting down his plate in front of him. She planted a kiss on his head and sat back on her chair.

"I'm not hungry anymore" Maria admitted, leaving half of her plate full.

"Finish your plate" Natalia asked nicely.

"But I'm not hungry" she whined.

"Maria… You know," she explained calmly, "there's people out there, sometimes they don't eat for days and you, you are a really lucky girl because you eat three meals a day… I'd like you to empty your plate, please"

Maria looked down at her plate and ate some more. After dinner, she helped Natalia cleaning the table as her sister went up to her room to draw and her brothers went out with Zachary to play hockey.

"Why are there people that don't eat just like we do every day?"

"It can be for a lot of reasons" Natalia said, bending to meet her eyes. "Poverty mostly"

"That's so sad… I hope it never happens to us"

"I hope it too, I wouldn't want you guys to starve. Thanks for eating all of your dinner, sweetheart"

"Maybe we could give some food to these people so they can eat"

"Yeah" she smiled, tearing up.

She kissed Maria's head and hugged her tight.

"I love you so much"

"I love you too, mommy" she replied, wrapping her arms around her neck.

"Go upstairs and get your sister and yourself ready for your bath, okay?"

Maria nodded and ran off.


	30. Chapter 30

**So this is the last chapter of this story. Thanks for reading/reviewing. xoxo**

_**8pm that night…**_

Natalia was in the girls' bedroom, tucking them in. She sat on Maria's bed first.

"Why were you crying earlier? What was in that book?" Maria asked her mother.

"Things you don't want to know. Things that I don't want you to know"

"Are you going to tell me someday when I'm all grown up?"

"You'll probably talk about it at school eventually, when you're older."

"I'd rather you tell me about it. Teachers are so boring" she said, rolling her eyes.

Natalia chuckled at this.

"It's not a bedtime story, darling, it will bring nightmares. Mommy still has a lot of nightmares because of that"

"Is Daddy in the story too?"

"Yes, fortunately"

"Was he handsome?"

"Of course he was" she smiled. "Alright, time to sleep, now. Goodnight, I love you"

Natalia kissed her older daughter's forehead and stroked her hair.

"I love you too" Maria said back.

Natalia brought the covers to her neck and turned off her lamp before walking to Jessica's bed. Jessica sat up when her mother sat next to her.

"I can't find Kitty Kat, mommy" she said, talking about her stuffed cat.

"When's the last time you saw Kitty Kat?" Natalia asked.

Jessica shrugged and Natalia told her to stay in her bed while she was going downstairs to look for it. She came back two minutes later, the stuffed cat in her hand.

"Here you go, baby" Natalia said, giving Kitty Kat to Jessica, sitting on the bed.

"Mommy? Can I do some finger painting tomorrow?"

"We'll see. You know I don't like you guys to stay inside when it's beautiful outside"

"Please" the little girl pouted.

"We'll see" she repeated. "Time to sleep, okay?"

She brought the covers to her neck just like she did with Maria then kissed Jessica's forehead.

"Goodnight. I love you"

"Me too. Mommy, don't forget the night light!" she reminded Natalia like she did every night, just to be sure"

"I won't" Natalia assured.

Jessica was afraid of the dark just like she was. They probably had different reasons but still. Natalia stood and walked to the door.

"Goodnight" she whispered one last time to her daughters.

"Goodnight" the little girls whispered back.

Natalia walked downstairs and saw that Zachary was sweeping off the pieces of the book that were still on the floor.

"Let me help you" she said as she walked closer.

"I think we're going to have to pay that back" he chuckled, cleaning the mess.

"Well maybe they'll think twice the next time a kid is going to ask to borrow a book like that. Zachary, there were pictures in that. I mean, you saw how it was. Would you like our kids to see that too? I certainly don't" she explained with a sigh.

"I know, you're right"

Zachary opened the front door and walked to the outdoor fireplace, throwing the pages in it before setting it in fire. Natalia was standing next to him, holding his arm, as they watched it burn.

"That's how my father died" she muttered.

Zachary wrapped his arm around her and kissed her head, holding her tight.

_**11pm that night… **_

"I'll check on the kids" Natalia told Zachary as they were about to go to sleep.

"Alright, I'll wait for you" he replied, walking to their bedroom.

_**Upstairs…**_

Natalia opened the girls' door and saw they were both asleep then checked on Michael and Daniel that were also sleeping soundly. She knocked softly on Aleksander's door and opened it a little, seeing him awake, lying on his bed. The boy turned his head to look at her and Angel popped her head up.

"Hey mom" Aleksander whispered.

"Can't sleep?" she asked, walking in. "Hey girl" she added, stroking Angel's head.

"There's too much going on in my head"

"Like what?" she questioned, sitting on his bed.

"I'm just tired of being so different" he shrugged.

Natalia sighed and lied down next to him. Aleksander rested his head on the crook of her shoulder as she wrapped an arm behind his neck.

"I know it's hard… I'm sorry about that, you know"

"It's not your fault"

"Well kind of, I'm the guilty one in this - "

"Did you ever regret having me?" he interrupted her.

"I was scared at first when I found out I was pregnant with you… And then I saw your cute little face" she confessed, tearing up. "I'll never regret you, honey. I'll never regret any one of you, you're my little angels" she burst into tears, kissing the side of his head.

"How was it?" he murmured. "There…"

"Just like the pictures" she whispered, crying. "Just like the pictures" she repeated, kissing his head again.

"I'm sorry you had to go to that horrible place. But why this… man" he hesitated, not knowing if it was right to say his name. "Why did he want to kill all those people?"

"Because he had no heart" Natalia replied. "And because he never knew what love is and I feel sorry for him for that. Everybody needs to be love at least once in their life. He was nothing but a man full of hatred"

"Can you tell me more about my father?"

Aleksander asked this question practically every week and Natalia always told him a few things about Josef. She thought he deserved to know.

"What do you want to know?"

"Anything"

"He told me, once, that even if something ever happened to him, he would always be with me. And sometimes, I like to think he was talking about you. I know he's somewhere, deep down inside you" she explained, poking his stomach lightly, causing him to giggle. "And I know you'll grow up to be a wonderful and handsome young man just like he was"

"Do you think you'd still be with him if he hadn't died?"

"I don't know… maybe…"

"I love you, mommy" he whispered, hugging her tight.

"I love you too"

They stayed like that for a while, Aleksander's head on his mother's chest, as she stroked his blonde hair, seeing him drifting to sleep. She got up quietly and walked back downstairs to her bedroom.

"That took a while" Zachary said as he heard her enter. "Someone wasn't asleep?"

"I had a little chit-chat with my big boy" she admitted, lying down under the covers.

"That's what I thought"

"I'd like to thank you Zachary" she said, cuddling up to him.

"What for?"

"Everything. The kids, this life, for loving me. For that strong feeling you make growing inside my stomach each day. I still have butterflies every time you kiss me… I want you to know that I'm grateful and that you're the one that really saved me"

"No, you saved me"

He kissed her softly.

"I love you"

"I love you too" she said back.


End file.
